I have encountered circumstances in which people did not edit their posts for about a week after first posting. If you guys can manage to get your posts straightened out the first time through, my last point is null. Still, I feel as if the extra time can only help us make a more interesting story.

And, for you Sola, I have a few possibly annoying comments
-I don't know about the rest of us, but I find it more difficult to read a huge block of text than I do separate blocks of text. In the future, I would appreciate it if you could press enter every now and then when narrating. ;P
-When you said that the Red Dwarf Inn looks "as if abandoned" I became really confused, especially after the next two sentences. I know what it means now, but you get the picture.
-Are all the guards left-handed? You noted that their swords are on their right, but I'm not sure that's what you meant...