[quote=Dinh AaronMk]
It's a fine start. Though a broad concern would be the lack of narrative to establish the setting. Descriptions of the gardens, the buildings, weather, and sounds of the party. As the post stands it is kind of bland. The only real description I can call up is that of clothing. But we had no real physical descriptions. Though that itself can be difficult to do without rattling off every single physical point in one long list, and apart from broader features you'll have to pay attention to details as they go along; like how so-and-so's nose flairs when they're upset or if it's long how it might be dotted with wine if he too excitedly drinks from his goblet, among other things. Or leave that behind in a sort of in-perspective monologue about someone's appearance or a character's thoughts on his own outward appearance if he goes to look in a mirror as an example.Minor things I might point out would be that you probably couldn't have noted the gender of the priestess, even with the foreign title. It could have been done organically if a phrase like, "she added" was tossed in at the end of her dialog and we can piece it together there. And if you're going to begin a paragraph with "half hour later" then a bolded "thirty minutes later" subtitle is pretty necessary.Otherwise, you seem to be on the right track. As I like to approach any NRP I get into and if possible I tackle it as I would a standard RP. Just with more available characters under more strict personal control than any other NPC. And you seem to have shown you're aware that often characters - even in the same nation - have agendas of their own and will openly play that out.
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Thanks for the input, I really appreciate it