So I guess while people are talking about this I might share a little about myself. I will say that I have suffered from Depression and Anxiety in the past. The feeling I have these days is better than what it has been and most of that I owe to the current friends that I have.

I know it sounds cliché but all my problems started at school with the bullying and torments. I was never really popular and more of a nerdy high achiever, which left me vulnerable to the crap that other people would dish out to me. It left me with both mental and physical scarring, often hating my life and left me feeling alone so many times. I've actually got a self inflicted burn on my left arm that has been there since I was about 15 or so, and it so happens to co-insides with the same week that I snapped from all the crap I was given and ended up sending one of my bullies to the medical centre after a single punch to the mouth.

After leaving school it took me ages to gain the confidence in myself to at least like the person who I was. Online friends helped heaps since on the internet you start off as your Alias name and you can display to people the traits that you want to display. I also came to learn that there are heaps of people out there that go through similar scenarios and some do have it worse than you.

My most recent issue, at 27, was last year when I came out of a relationship where my ex pretty much used me as a rebound for her previous relationship. What made it all the worse was the way she broke up, basically making it out that it was all my fault that it didn't work out. Not gonna go into details but it actually put me into a pretty heavy state where I just thought, "Fuck this, sick of being used by people" (Previous years I had some friends back stabbed me in pretty bad ways) and I didn't really care much about myself. Ended up going to the doctors after some advice from people and was prescribed 150mg tablets of Effexor XR.

Well I had some weird adverse reaction to the point where I was actually as high as a kite and I immediately stop the medication because it was concerning several people. Probably the worse thing I could have done as the sudden high and immediate drop put me even further down the rabbit hole with me spending 2 days not moving from my bed, or sleeping because I had nightmares of slicing my neck open with a circular saw and when I was awake I felt like ODing with the remainder of the pills. I actually owe it to a friend of mine who happened to call me and talked me through the entire situation.

I don't wanna make my post any longer as I think people will get the idea of what I'm saying. Not all mental illness is caused by genetics and some are often the result of what we experience, but there is always a way out. People do go through some pretty terrible times and I do believe that no matter how down you feel, it does not mean that the next events that happen in your life will be terrible. Sometimes you need to see the darkness to understand how precious and rewarding the light can be.