Artemis flopped in front of Peter hurriedly, attempting to defuse the situation before he got hurt. "What he means is, we're weary travellers looking for a place to stay for the night. Please, we're not thieves. I mean, look at this bunch, how could they possibly steal any...." Artemis glanced around at his companions. A ditzy llama, a starving Sand-Shark, a dead man with his jaw hanging off and a humming man-bird hybrid looked back at him. "Oh God...." he murmured, realising how strange this must of looked. The guard grunted in agreement. "Okay, we can let you into Polis on a few conditions. A, don't scare the children or the baby seals. You make the baby seals cry, you're out. 2, don't steal anything. X27, take a look in the mirror and fix yourself, you disgusting little sausage" said the guard finally, staring down at the blob fish with a look of disgust. "Oh and we'll need a bit of the old coin before we let you in. You know, for our troubles" said the other guard, a smirk forming on his face.

"The local authorities take bribes, there's stork records and a siren dating service. What a lovely city Polis sounds like" said Artemis, rolling his beady eyes. He flopped around to face his companions. "Okay, men...and lady-llama thing, we're going to need to pull together a bit of cash to give to these individuals before they'll let us in. Thing is, I left my wallet in my other pants, so if one of you can lend me something, I'm willing to pay it back at a later date" said Artemis, with a large shit-eating grin on his face.

Not even in the gates of Polis and he was already looking to break into something.