Ssarak Dyreackthanose and Meirin Kurenai

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After a few hours travel beyond the bridge, the group settled down for the night and, instead of camping out in the elements, they even managed to find an old abandoned building to act as shelter. Normally, that would make for a fairly comfortable night, but the attitude of the group was nowhere close to comfortable. Apart from the caravan master giving his instructions, most of the team was uneasily silent. There was a great deal of tension in the air, mostly directed at Alaira, and while Ssarak shared that sentiment as well, he also had other thoughts on his mind. While eating dinner, most of his time was spent mentally looping through the same worries. This was his first real mission for the college, and it just happened to be something he had done many times back in his homeland. When he first accepted the escort, he assumed that fact would make him more comfortable out in the field, but now it was just serving to remind him of the danger they were in. He had lost friends and acquaintances during escort missions in his homeland, something that could easily happen again.
Like most of the others, Ssarak was obviously worried about working with Alaira. She had proved in case after case that she was a danger to her allies and, right now, was the most likely cause of the failure of the mission. However, there was also something else on his mind which, strangely enough, seemed to take more of his attention. At the river, he had noticed Meirin was injured, and even though it was a minor, simple wound, he could not stop his own worry. Even now, it was nagging at his mind. Blood loss was not the only way one could die from a wound; infection was perhaps the deadliest killer on any battlefield. Rationally, he knew that she had taken care of her injury and was almost certainly going to be fine, but the very fact that he was worrying about it hours after the event, when he did not even give his own wounds such concern, gave him...confusing thoughts. Just after the caravan master retired for the night, Meirin was standing watch outside and, for whatever reason, Ssarak felt the urge to check on her. He did not know what he hoped to accomplish, but nevertheless, he stood up from his bedroll and stepped outside. 

After a brief look around, Ssarak found Meirin near the caravan's horse, though he was not quite sure why he did not look there to begin with. It was, after all, the entire reason any of them needed to stand guard. It was when he was walking up to her that he suddenly realized he had no idea what he even wanted to say. [color=f7941d]"I...hello. Is everything alright out here?"[/color] He asked.
Meirin turned to face the familiar voice. She had heard someone coming out and figured it might have been Ssarak. Of course it could have been anyone, but somehow Meirin was expecting him. It was hard not to, as of late. 

Despite everything that has happened so far Meirin had just realized that this was her first mission with Ssarak, not including the demon incident. They worked fairly well together but something else was nagging Meirin's thoughts. As strange as it was, Meirin felt that she needed to protect Ssarak. The odd thing came from the fact that, in combat, Ssarak is more than capable of holding his own. He was likely a better fighter than Meirin, at least when it came to warfare. She was no stranger to violence but the worse she ever fought was soldiers who turned to banditry. And yet she sensed a certain weakness in Ssarak that she felt that she needed to protect. She couldn't place what exactly she wanted to guard however.

Meirin's thoughts returned to her when Ssarak asked his question. It had barely been an hour and he was already concerned. Though it's hard not to considering what the captain had told them a while ago. [color=00a651]"Everything is fine. The horses are still restless but give them another hour and I'm sure even they'll be asleep. What about you? Your shift isn't until much later Ssarak. Do you need to use the bathroom?"[/color] Mostly a joke to lighten the otherwise dark mood that loomed over everyone, though if Ssarak really did need to relieve himself Meirin already took the time to dig them a hole on the other side of the cabin.

[color=f7941d]"No, I...do not know, honestly."[/color] Ssarak began as he leaned against the wall near Meirin. [color=f7941d]"I suppose I am just feeling tense, worried. No one inside is in a mood to speak, and I do not like being left alone with my thoughts at the moment. I feel I will worry myself into an early grave if I do."[/color]

Ssarak was not sure what else he could say about his reason for stepping outside, especially since he was not even certain what it was. Thinking about it, passing the time seemed like just as good of a reason as any, but there were still those nagging worries at the back of his mind; those unreasonably paranoid fears about Meirin's safety that he was trying not to dwell upon. He worried that it would seem strange if he showed such concern, but eventually, he brought himself to ask regardless. [color=f7941d]"So...are you sure you were able to clean your wound properly? Infection can be terribly dangerous."[/color] He asked. 

Meirin couldn't help buy smile at Ssarak's concern. It was rather endearing that he would care so much, but surely even he saw her clean out her cut. Meirin was certain because when she saw Ssarak looking at her she even made a point to apply some ointment to help mend the skin and block out infection. [color=00a651]"Yes, I'm quite certain. I even used my poultice to make sure the cut heals and no infection settles in. You can see for yourself!"[/color] Meirin turned her shoulder for Ssarak to see in the dim moon light, and sure enough where she had been cut by the captain's blade was now nothing more than a thin red line.

And yet from the sound of Ssarak's voice and the look in his eyes, Meirin's cut was the least of his worries. Meirin understood that he was concerned about their safety. Even if Meirin doesn't know Darius very well and doesn't have the best impression of Alaira, it was normal to be concerned about their livelihood. But Meirin couldn't shake there there was something else that Ssarak was concerned about. And she suspects that it had to do something with Meirin herself. [color=00a651]Ssarak.[/color]

Meirin pushed herself off the wagon and walked closer to Ssarak. She was trying to look friendly, but the concern on her face was as clear as day. [color=00a651]"Remember when I told you that, if you ever want my help, or even just want to talk, you can always come to me?"[/color] Meirin opened her mouth to say more, but no words came out. She felt that she had said all she needed to. Now Ssarak needed to anwser her question.

Ssarak was silent for a few, long moments, his head lowered and looking slightly away from her. She had picked up on his fears, though he had to admit, he had not been hiding them very well. However, he was still not even certain in his own intentions. He came outside because he felt compelled to check on her, but his reason for that confused him more than he would like. Worrying about friends was normal, but it seemed like any time he had a reason to worry, she was the first person he thought about. It was like a part of him had dedicated itself to making sure she was safe, which only served to confuse him further. Similar thoughts about her had crossed his mind before, but now that they were facing danger regularly, they were stronger than ever. 
 
 By this point, Ssarak had been staring awkwardly for long enough that he had to force himself to speak up after letting out a deep sigh. [color=f7941d]"My worries are justified, are they not? We know we are heading into danger. Anything can happen and...I worry about losing friends."[/color] He finally said, though his quick answer did not explain why so much of his attention was focused solely on Meirin. Even Lyn did not seem to recieve quite the same kind of concern from him.

Meirin shook her head. Ssarak was trying to avoid the subject, so she'll have to press on. [color=00a651]"That's understandable Ssarak. I... I know how you feel about losing those who are close to you. And is that why you came out here?"[/color] Meirin's heart began to flutter. While she isn't exactly reserved, she typically does her best to be humble and not think too highly of herself. But part of her wanted to think that she was important to someone, to Ssarak. She had always felt this attraction to him. Admiration for his skills, empathy for his past, and respect for who he is. Something about Ssarak drew Meirin to him, but she always held these feelings in check. These feelings could cause pain and hurt her and Ssarak, and that was the last thing she wanted to do to someone so close to her. And most of all, she couldn't bare to imagine would what happen if it turns out that these feelings were one sided.

The fact that Ssarak was here opened Meirin's mind to the idea that perhaps he could return her feelings. She couldn't hesitate now. [color=00a651]"Out of everyone here, I care about you the most Ssarak. I will gladly give my life to save everyone here if they're in danger, but I would be happier to live for you."[/color]

Ssarak had not expected Meirin's response, and it quite obviously caught him off guard. Her tone, the way she was speaking, it all seemed like...there was something she wanted to say. Before he realized it, his heart was starting to beat faster as he thought about what she could mean by 'happier to live for him.' They had been close for the past few months, that much was undeniable. He thought of her more fondly than any friend he had ever had, but he would be lying to himself if he did not admit there was more to it.  The thoughts of how he might want to become...closer than friends had certainly crossed his mind over the last few months, but he had always found way to push them aside. Now, however, with the way she was speaking...he did not want to ignore them. Even if he had been consciously rejecting the idea, he could not hide from his own emotions.

[color=f7941d]"I...do not think I could agree more. You are a friend closer than any I have had, but...it is more than that, is it not? The thoughts I have had, the...paranoia about your safety..."[/color] He said, giving a slight, if nervous chuckle. [color=f7941d]"Do you feel..." He began, though he could not find the words to continue.

There were only a few words that Meirin could say in responds to Ssarak. Just a few words that could clear up this entire conversation. They were simple words, and yet they carry so much weight. Meirin stepped forward to Ssarak and wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug. She squeezed him tightly, to show Ssarak the strength of her conviction. 
[color=00a651]"I love you."[/color]

Ssarak was speechless, though there was perhaps no way he could adequately respond. At first, he was motionless as well, but after she wrapper her arms around him, he did the same. He stopped himself from squeezing her [i]too[/i] tightly, given his strength, but he easily showed through action he felt the same. Even with the cold steel of his armor separating them, he felt closer to her at that moment than he had ever been to another. 

[color=f7941d]"And...I love you."[/color] He responded with complete honesty, something he had not thought he would ever be able to do again. [color=f7941d]"You are...sure about this? With you Human and me being Esyire...do you think this can work? Do you think people..."[/color] He began, but stopped himself when his nerves gave way to a sudden wave of conviction. [color=f7941d]"Actually, no, to the Pit with what others think. All that matters is you and me."[/color]

Meirin could only smile warmly as Ssarak admitted his feelings for her. Even more so when he said so resolutely that he wouldn't care what others thought about them, despite being human and Esyire. Meirin buried her face into Ssarak's chestplate. She could feel his heart beating through the steel. 

[color=00a651]"I loved you for a long time Ssarak, and I will continue to for the rest of my life. Now..."[/color]
Meirin slipped out from Ssarak's grasp, leaning up to tap him on his nose and snap him out of any fantasies he might be having. [color=00a651]"You need to rest! Your shift is next... And I'd like it if you could keep me warm tonight."[/color]

Ssarak's eyes had been closed as he hugged her, so he was actually somewhat surprised when she tapped his nose. In any case, he did not exactly want to go to sleep so soon. With this revelation, there was much he wanted to talk with her about: how they had felt about one another over the past few months, how they were going to tell their friends, or even just casual small talk with her. No matter the topic, he just wanted to spend time with her, but as much as he hated to admit it, she was right. He did need to rest if he wanted to be ready for the next day. They were, after all, still on a mission.

[color=f7941d]"I...would like that. In the cold air of Djarkel, I believe I could use the warmth just as much as you."[/color] Ssarak said, his expression shifting to a smile. [color=f7941d]"Tomorrow...well, tomorrow we still have more to do. We [i]need[/i] to confront Alaira before we go any further, and we still need to discuss that map with the caravan master. What that guard captain told us was troubling. But, perhaps soon we can have the opportunity to just...take time together. Come and wake me when you are done out here."[/color]

As unnatural as it seemed to part from Meirin so soon after revealing their feelings to one another, Ssarak moved to head back inside, albeit reluctantly.

Waving goodbye at Ssarak Meirin's heart and mind were fluttering with emotions. Her confession with Ssarak combined with the worry about the mission mixed together, but she let happier thoughts prevail. She had felt this attraction to Ssarak ever since they first met on the opening day. It was minor back than, just a whim, but over time as she became more familiar with the college she grew to like Ssarak more. Even with his dark past she found a troubled soul who still remained strong, but also someone who wouldn't deny her help. Meirin held many people at the college near and dear to her, but Ssarak was always the one who held a special place in her heart.

When Ssarak went back inside Meirin went back to the wagon. The horses were asleep by now she she softly positioned herself back to where she was guarding. She had to focus on keeping watch, but still allowed herself to think about her new relationship with Ssarak. How would they live now that they confessed to one another? Would it be too much if Meirin offered to let Ssarak move into her room? How would Meirin's friends react to this knowledge? Her teachers? While she didn't care for it if they only had negative things to say, she did want to brag about Ssarak. She couldn't help but feel a surge of pride for both herself and him. And while she had no doubts there will be those who would contest their relationship, she wouldn't let them break what she and Ssarak had with each other. If anything, it'll only strengthen their bonds as they stand side-by-side to face whatever challenge comes their way. It'll certainly be needed for what's to come. Gossip and harsh words are easier to deal with than cut-thoats and demons, which Meirin thinks takes a bit more precedence right now.