[color=00a99d]"Why do people keep trying to message me? They know I'm busy."[/color] Food-kun mumbled. As usual, he had a slew of messages from other players, most along the lines of challenges and complaints. Food-kun was the legendary master chef, immortal cooking legend. A post envied by pretty much everyone, but no one knew how much grief it brought him. Fame cost him more than most people knew. Lots of people who knew his name meant lots of people who messaged him every single day. [quote=Iron_Zach] [b]To:[/b] Donttouchmyfood [b]Subject:[/b] Challenge! I am the true iron chef! Fight me in a cooking battle! [/quote] [quote=Richy_Mcmoneybags] [b]To:[/b] Donttouchmyfood [b]Subject:[/b] Commission I require the services of the best chef in the world. I want you to make a meal for me. I will give you 1 million gold for it. [/quote] [quote=xxX_MLGWarrioR_Xxx] [b]To:[/b] Donttouchmyfood [b]Subject:[/b] **** U **** SCRUB U STOL MY KIL U WOT M8 1V1 ME RITE NAOW U **** **** **** [/quote] He began typing out a letter he'd typed out a million times before. [quote=Donttouchmyfood] [b]To:[/b] Whoever I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but due to my current workload, I am currently unable to accept any requests. If it is an urgent matter, please see me personally. If I am not in my kitchen in the fairy forest, I may be in the Hydra pit, Dragon cave, Hell, Chimera den, or some other yet undiscovered hunting ground. May this letter find you in good health. Also, to any repeat recipients, please stop sending me messages. [/quote] He did this for every message in his inbox. It may have taken longer than people would appreciate, but in the end, he was a teacher. He appreciated some formality and he was very business-like when dealing with people. Even though he had a series of messages from people on his friends list as well, he automatically typed the same message. [quote=Datze][b]To:[/b] Don’ttouchmyfood [b]Subject:[/b] Got a good quest I've got a good quest that may or may not involve some interesting cooking, come to the castle if you're interested.[/quote] [color=00a99d]“To Datze. Due to my current workload…”[/color] Food-kun muttered as he typed out the message. He sent the reply without any second thoughts. After all of the messages were gone from the inbox, he stretched. It was time for him to work. [color=00a99d]“Hmm…”[/color] Food-kun said, checking his inventory. [color=00a99d]“My shipments are missing.”[/color] He then recalled a message he’d replied to earlier, about how his shipment got stolen by some guild looking for him. The message was from the guild itself, commanding that he join their guild and cook for them in order for his shipments to be returned. It happened quite often, really. His cooking gave incredible stat bonuses, and everyone wanted his meals. Some would say that it was a waste of his cooking skills to not share it, but he didn’t care. He didn’t want to be the best chef in the world, he just wanted to eat tasty food. [color=00a99d]“Looks like it’s time to collect.”[/color] Food-kun said, getting up. ------------------------------------------------- “Where is that bastard…” The guild leader said. His guild was the black wolves, one of the strongest guilds in the game. A proud and ruthless bunch, they were based in a massive stone fortress, cultivated by the hard work of the guild members. But they always wanted to be stronger, and they happened on a shipment of spices headed over to the legendary chef. “He’ll have no choice but to join us now…” Guild leader said. Suddenly, massive explosion was heard outside. The guild leader rushed out onto the terrace and saw smoke coming out of the fortress’s front gate. Made of cast iron, none of the guild could imagine it being destroyed, but there was a massive hole in the gate. [color=00a99d]“Hello, all.”[/color] Food-kun said, emerging from the dust. [color=00a99d]“I’m here to collect my spices.”[/color] “He’s here! Kill him! Kill him!” The guild members said, panicking. The archers shot their arrows and the mages shot their spells, kicking up a dust cloud. “Stop, stop, stop!” The guild leader called down. He didn’t want to kill him; he just wanted him to join their guild. The guild members waited anxiously for the dust to settle, to see the result of their work. Suddenly, a cleaver came out of nowhere, smashing into the guild leader’s face, instantly killing the high-level tank. [color=00a99d]“It’s you, isn’t it? Hurry up and gimme my spices.”[/color] Food-kun said calmly, walking out of the dust. “Hekilled the leader!” One of the mages cried “Kill him!” Food-kun dashed close to the falling leader’s body. His hand gained a metallic sheen and it darted into the leader’s chest before coming out covered in blood. In his hands was the leader’s heart. He began chewing on it as he was showered in arrows and spells. [quote] For eating the heart of a vicious warrior, your stats have improved. Maximum health increased by 100,000 100% of health has been restored. +20 to Strength, Dexterity and Vitality. +50 to endurance. Effects last for a day. [/quote] [color=00a99d]“Hm. Chewy.”[/color] Food-kun said. The leader’s heart wasn’t too bad, but it wasn’t exactly great. He’d had better hearts, of course, but it wasn’t bad. As he ate with one hand, he took the cleaver in the other and started swinging away. With every swing, he’d take another life. He ignored the items they dropped as it would be rude to take them. He soon began killing every member that was attacking him, but he chose to ignore those who ran away. Food-kun continued into the stone fortress, breaking the walls in his way. ------------------------------------------ “Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck…” The second in command said. The second in command, a powerful mage, regretted his decision to try recruiting Food-kun, the immortal iron chef. Food-kun was out there butchering everyone in sight, and the second in command could be next. Second in command was grabbing everything he could from the storage house, before the wall burst open. Sunlight streamed in and Food-kun was revealed in all of his bloody glory. Second in command shrunk away from his fearsome form, but Food-kun ignored him. He began rummaging through the storage stuff, looking for his spices. [color=00a99d]“Ah.”[/color] Food-kun said. He’d found his spices! Pocketing his entire shipment of spices, he swiftly walked out of the hole in the wall he’d made, leaving a perplexed second in command in his wake. -------------------------------------------- [color=00a99d]“All spices accounted for.”[/color] Food-kun said, taking inventory. He walked slowly through the wrecked compound, through holes he’d dug himself. [color=00a99d]“Guess I should do that quest that was found the other day.”[/color] Food-kun said. He walked away slowly from the smoking, destroyed fortress of the once proud black wolves guild.