I'm feeling ever more lonely and an unknown emotion(?) is bottling up inside of me. How come everyone can think I'm good looking but look at me as if I'm some sort of alien- why should I be ostracised because of the most retarded thing ever? Fucking idiots saying that I'm alienatingly good at school, calling me a prodigy and the only thing I get is a teachers recognition which isn't worth shit? Leaving me to dream myself into a world of wonder which will never become reality? Life is forcing me to continue on in this banishment?

If there is a God then I hate him, if he hates me then he should kill me- I'm a nonbeliever in suicide, but if he kills me then it's fine right?! 

School is the worst environment of ones life, why isn't homeschooling legal? WHAT FUCKING IDIOT IS RUNNING MY COUNTRY? WHY ARE YOU DESTROYING MY PSYCHOLOGICAL BAlANCE?!