Person one: Hey, check out this song I like!
Person two: I'd genuinely love to!
Person one: Do you like it?
Person two: What kind of question is that? Me and you-- and everyone else-- all have the same taste in music!
Person one: What's a "taste in music"? That's like having a "taste in Oxygen."
Person two: At least I didn't ask if I liked the song. "Hurr, do you like boobies? Hurrdurr."
Person one: It was a joke.
Person two: Yeah, whatever. Is that your sister I hear walking through the front door?
Person one: Why do you care?
Person two: Just wondering.
Person one: Abigail is fourteen. And she's a huge bitch.
Person two: I'm only seventeen.
Person one: Dude, fourteen year olds are too young for seventeen year olds.
Person two: That's only three years apart. My dad is seven years older than my mom.
Person one: It's not the same. You're basically an adult and she peed her pants two weeks ago.
Person two: Adults pee their pants.
Person one: No they don't. Maybe you do, but no one else does.
Person two: Shut up, fag. 
Person one: At least I'm not a child molester.
Person two: I'm not even eighteen! You can't be a child molester when you're still a child.
Person one: Says who?
Person two: Your sister.
Person one: That's not even funny.
Person two: She thought it was funny. She also thought- Hi.
Abigail: Person one, Mom said you have to do the dishes before Dad gets home.
Person one: Yeah, okay! Get out of my room.
Abigail: What game are you guys playing?
Person one: Leave me alone, Abigail!

...

Person two: Hey look what my girlfriend just sent me.
Person one: That's hilarious.