Also, [@The New Yorker] posted while I was working on mine, so don't consider my post cannon until I edit everything I need to.  I've been ninja'd. EDIT: Hopefully fixed Acamen's actions to accommodate your post, will read it in full later.  Have to go make Calzones.

[@Dead Cruiser] That would be fine, but do your really want to feature your guy dying a terrible death :D