It still hurts...I want to take therapy, but my mom doesn't trust a therapist. She worries that her friend's will laugh at her for having a crazy child, even with all the love she gives me...she's worried about others viewpoints, sad. Each and every day of these two weeks, headaches and voices filled my 'used to be' empty brain. Thoughts that I don't think about fill my mind; emotions of hurt, sadness, anger, and envy poison me. [i]What's going on?![/i] Sleeps been scarce, ever since it started to happen...my brain wouldn't allow me to-...the scars. Still h-...[i]Fuck it's happening again...[/i] I hate it, the drape's that cover my warm body; sweat that slithers down my skin, acceptance is hard. Life is hard, [i]fuck![/i]

The morning sun fills my black room. The poster's reflect light; the empty bottle of beer next to me falls down. [i]Hate my life...[/i] I shouldn't be drinking. It hurt's to know that my mom works her ass off all day, supporting for me...and only me. It would be easier to die, leaving the world would make my mom much happier...I think. Shower's, for me, are odd now. It's like each droplet of water has a voice...speaking to me. I do it anyway, there's this event for a club I'm going to after school and I shath not be dirty! 

My hope's are slowly rising again, the voices have lowered their tone. It doesn't hurt as much...not right now at least. My homework's finished, Lunch bags set, all done for now I guess. I sit on the couch, waiting for Cullen to come to my house. I usually tease Cullen about Twilight; ironic that a football player would be so intrigued by the Twilight series and his name would be Cullen. My thought's have rejected me from making any rude remarks...he find's it odd now. 

I hear his car coming up my parking lot. " Hope he's okay... " [i]Worry?[/i] I forget the thought, standing I walk my way towards the door. We make small glance's, he's worried. Definitely. I'm scared now, Cullen is usually a happy light, the world doesn't usually worry him. " A-...are you okay? " Stuttering, sucks ass. " Yeah... " There's dejection in his voice, he's odd today. I don't question it any further. Getting in his car we soon drive off to the school. The atmosphere was awkward when we got to school...Cullen was usually the happy one, the guy who made my day but...guess not. 

Cullen parks his car at the parking lot, quickly after I get out he locks his car and walks away from me in almost and instant. Frowning at his choice of action I just decide to walk towards class, now that I think of it I should've skipped school. My excuse would most likely be valid. The school feels unnatural in my point of view, the voice's aren't so loud. For the two weeks, I've gained the voices I've been able to control them...the tone of their yells have gotten softer and now I am able to manage. 

Classes fly by fast since it's may and school is near its edge not much work is being handed out anymore. Glad for that; the teachers at the school are okay... not much better than most. Class goes by really fast, my mind works with pace and it feels as if I feel the answers I write, the friction when the pencil is forced upon the piece of paper is loud in my head. It doesn't hurt, does it?

Mr. Philip's nice, an okay/great teacher. I don't mind him at all, the class is an odd one. The voice's speak of cheerleaders, sexual thoughts, and all sorts of crazy things...I'm starting to think that I can read minds like a telepathic or some sort. As I am writing down, the class become's silent. " He disappeared! " a student called out. We were all in awe, fear struck me as a voice had lowered...his thought's or what I theorize are his thoughts are gone...erased from my mind. Cold shiver's slithered up my spine...[i]The light hath not burn brightly, tis the reason why the man had faded. Something starts. A new world tis about to begin.[/i]

[b]Too tired to correct grammar...[/b]