A bit behind on the subject, but I thought sleep paralysis was simply the feeling of being fully awake and lucid, but not being able to move.  I recall having sleep paralysis exactly once, and it felt nothing like an out of body experience or anything like that, it just felt like my mind had woken up but my body hadn't and I couldn't move for about five seconds.  Weird, and a little scary in that "I feel like I'm trapped in my own body" sort of way, but far from a paranormal feeling.

Anyways, I've had some weird ass dreams before.  Like this one.

I was driving through Dallas, trying to get to some place I didn't really know, but I had a map. I was about to exit from my highway and join another when I noticed that the road ahead was completely flooded, as in what was once solid land and road was now a lake. Naturally, I started to take a detour, but it led me to the really ghetto part of Dallas. There came a point that I knew I wouldn't get around the lake without either walking or doubling back and taking another highway. So, I did the completely logical thing and got out and walked.

I got to the other side of the lake, but then I saw a group of ISIS troops moving out of a small drainage tunnel. I introduced myself as a journalist so as to avoid getting my ass shot off, and they took me in, though somewhat threateningly. I actually began to take a liking to some of them, so it was a shame that I was hatching a plan to kill them all; either that or get away and tell the CIA or something. I began to take count of their guns, finding about 6 AKs of various types, a couple of pistols and an uzi. I knew I was hopelessly outnumbered and outgunned, but they weren't being overtly hostile, so I figured I still had some time to make a plan.

One of the guys, who I noticed wasn't taking very kindly to my presence, began to threaten me with his rifle. I began to plead, but not too pitifully, for my life before he started firing shots at me. none of them hit, but by that point the guy whom I deduced was the head honcho shot him, then proceeded to use his AK and bayonet as a pike to stab the hell out of the other guy's back. I was just about to leave while no one else was looking, but then I was like "Ehh, fuck it, I'm having fun." I came back just in time to see a trio of other people show up making a "Hail Hitler" gesture, whom I deduced were neo-nazis. The conversation that went on between them and the boss of the ISIS group confirmed my suspicions, though I couldn't help but be skeptical. They didn't quite come off as neo-nazis, just a group of really punkish kids, complete with cheap leather jackets, black skinny jeans, crazy hairstyles and combat boots.

"This some new guy?" the lead punk asked, gesturing to me. I couldn't help but think she was hot, but I didn't get the chance to continue looking as the guy the ISIS leader stabbed to death became a zombie and tried to bite me. I threw him off and made a run for it, though I reconsidered once I realized I didn't have a weapon, so I went back. Two others had already turned and the punk kids were nowhere to be found, nor were any of the 6 fucking AKs I had counted before. I searched for an AK until one of the zombies started to chase me away. I managed to knock it over and stomp it's skull in before I decided to withdraw and flank around to one side. As I did so, the gunfire died down, and I succeeded in staying out of sight. As it turned out, the punk kids were hanging out where I came around. "You're an interesting one. Want to hang out with us?" the leader asked, brandishing a newly acquired AKMS. I came back with "In a minute, I need an AK."

I dropped off of a ledge next to an elevator shaft a few meters away from where the ISIS guys all were. As it turned out two were left; one with an AKS-74U and the other with an AKM. I approached them slowly and tried to come off as though I was trying to help, but then they blamed me for the zombies killing their friends before raising their AKs and shooting at me. I got hit in the shoulder, but being in an adrenaline rush, I barely felt it. I got inside the elevator shaft and waited for the guy with the 74U to come into sight before karate chopping his neck, kneeing him in the groin, then headbutting him until he went down. I grabbed his AK and sprayed the other guy down, making sure to double tap each of them in the head.

It was a fun dream.