Ukraine, December 2nd



It's a gloomy, overcast evening in Kiev. Prime Minister Arseniy Yatsenyuk sits stiffly in his office. Russia's show of force, in claiming Crimea, has left a lasting impact on his nation's people. Across from him sits President Petro Poroshenko, looking unusually timid.

"I've just gotten off the phone with Yulia..."

"And?", Poroshenko inquired calmly.

"Damn it Petro!... Damn it all!"

"What is it?", Poroshenko again inquires.

"It's Putin. That bastard, that lunatic, will be the death of countless Ukrainian countrymen! He marches his men across our boarders, takes what he wants, and what does Europe do?"

Poroshenko gives no reply. He sits, waiting for this storm to blow over.

"Fucking nothing!", Yatsenyuk spits.

"Well, why should they?", Poroshenko responds calmly.

"Because Russia treads on their doorstep, gun in hand. This won't end till the Soviet states are reclaimed, till Putin has his empire."

"Well", Poroshenko contemplates, "It does us no good to contemplate our own mortality. What can a mouse do between two giants?"

"The mouse can pick one."


[hider=To Russia]
Mister Prime Minister,

In simple terms, we the Ukrainian people understand your motivations and ambitions. We see the rapidly expanding influence of the European Union, and the belligerence of Germany at the head. Given that conflict, political or otherwise, is unavoidable, we would like to seek a compromise with your nation, that would grant us both security and leverage on the international state. 

It is no news to you that Ukraine is a key political, strategic, and economic piece in gaining sway over Europe. The Union knows this, and will not respond well to shows of force. They know that Ukraine is too valuable to them, to be lost. This is why so much has been done on behalf of Britain and America to sway the leadership and citizenry of this country in favour of the West. If you want to occupy Ukraine, you'll be met with war, and endless internal rebellion.

We propose this instead;
Grant us ownership of Crimea again, and promise us independence as the People's Ukraine. In return, we offer a full military alliance, and rights to position troops and artillery within our boarders, granting a great strategic advantage over Europe. We will disassociate with the EU, and stand with our fellow Slavs, so long as our culture, laws, and lands are our own.

Regards,
-President Petro Poroshenko
[/hider]


[hider=To France, and all EU members]
Mister President,

We, the Ukrainian people, feel abandoned by the rest of Europe, in the face of Russia's continued aggression. Our people remain oppressed by Putin's forces. World powers are standing idly by, as crimes are being committed against humanity itself. If you continue to appease Russia, you will soon see the rise of a new USSR, and a massive Soviet force will be knocking at your door.

For the safety and freedom of all of Europe, we propose a compromise. In keeping with the precedent set in 2014, with our co-signing of the Ukraine-European Union Association Agreement, we would like to move to become a full member of the European Union, and abide by all obligations that entails. This will provide a massive economic boost to the European economy, and further the cause of peace, diplomacy, and European leadership around the world. In return, we demand immediate deployment of EU forces along Ukraine's boarders with Russia, as well as significant funding toward fully militarizing Ukraine. We will act as the front line against Russian imperialism, and fully commit ourselves to fending off the enemies of Europe, but only if our independence is supported and protected by France and the rest of Europe.

Please take this into full consideration. The consequences are too grave to overlook.

Regards,
-President Petro Poroshenko


[/hider]