I've come to the resigned conclusion that I'm afraid of death.  Not a sudden death, or a violent death so much, but a totally lucid death-bed scenario.  Where I know it's coming and I'll be awake to feel myself slip away.  
How am I supposed to know my life was good enough to comfortably end where it is at that particular point?  I'm sure inevitability gives some richer perspective, but I haven't the benefit of hindsight on this point.

Also, I realized today how shit scared I am of falling back into the bowels of my past depression.  It was so hard to claw my way out of, but I feel like it's always on the fringes.  The constant conflict of apathy, malaise, doubt, anxiety, desperation and loneliness were the source of three incredibly hard years for me.  Years that taught me a lot about myself, and made me a much stronger, more patient and compassionate person, but ones I hope never to repeat again because they were hell.


I mean, everything else is just your run of the mill.  I'm pretty sure I'd shit myself involuntarily at the sight of a charging grizzly bear.  Heights I don't much care for.  I'm afraid of bumps in the night too.  But most fears are totally natural, and motivate the majority of our decisions in life.  So I don't much worry about them.  But the two above, those are the ones that can keep me up at night.