[@NekoMizu]

Another option would be to keep this thread as 'absurd', and then make a sibling thread for 'original'; however, it sounds like you were somewhat looking for a combination of the two. It's just a point I figured I'd make because absurd doesn't automatically translate to original.

Honestly, I could come up with plenty of ideas to contribute to the thread (absurd or not), but if I keep doing it I'll just get annoyed about the fact that I'm not getting payed to create original story ideas. Plus I don't feel like spending time deciding how to top the last one I threw at you, at least not yet anyway.