Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Floch
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Floch King of Eldia

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@RyoRyoRyoKen@Gowi I'll get it on Discord/PMs for the works.
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Sergeant
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@Gowi@Sloth@RyoRyoRyokenI made the edits that were requested of me. I hope everything is good now, but if not I'll keep working on it. And for everyone's FYI all the bojutsu techniques have videos attached so if you're confused just click on the name of the technique and watch a video. :D Because I do admit I've never fought with a bo staff and I'm probably not the best to explain each technique.

Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Floch
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Here we go again. I'll try to edit stuff if some don't add up.
P.S I am going jutsuless for real because I can't think on what to have, so I will take it as a challenge and have it learned in the IC.
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Little Bill
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i accidentally kodo's whole post. will fix this later.
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by RyoRyoRyoken
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  • My only real misgivings are towards the abilities section. In terms of the Fujioji clan bojutsu, it'd be nice if we could get a feel for what exactly would make it a distinct style? Nakazono may not have a grasp of it yet, but surely he has at least been drilled on the principles behind it for the day when he would supposedly begin proper training in the style? As an example, neither Mikoto or Ria have master Murakumo-ryu Ninpo or Mi-enshin Kaiho respectively, but there's an inkling there of what may come about in the future given future training. I'm kind of going to give you a break on the Focus & Skills section off the strength of the fact that he's gimmick at the moment is that he "sucks".
  • I appreciate the indepth list of basic techs, but I'm not sure it's necessary in place of jutsu. That said, I'm not gonna knock it as a shorthand for you to refer back to, since at least it's organized. And it's a basis for the actual jutsu to be based off of, being potentially more intense variations of these movements.
  • Not really a criticism, but I find it funny that Nakazono tries his best to avoid Fukushu while finding Mikoto okay. Granted, Mikki's definitely "nicer" than Fukushu, so that makes sense.





  • Definitely an improvement in making sense.
  • Kinda hard to believe Kazuma just let himself be imprisoned, especially if he didn't commit the murder and just unlocked the Mangekyou Sharingan. And, frankly, I don't think @Gowi's going to be terribly fond of Kazuma unlocking MS, understandable trigger circumstances or not. That said, it still feels pretty tacked on.
  • Not necessarily a criticism, but I'm not sure if Mirajunohana needs to be a separate style on its own. That said, if you do want to go that route, then Shinkiroka is probably a better name, heh.
  • I'll let @Gowi handle any quibbles he might have with the family relations section.





  • So far so good. Honestly, the only part I'm iffy about is the pseudo-telepathy right now. (and maybe the slight spoiler?)
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Sergeant
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<Snipped quote by Sergeant>

  • My only real misgivings are towards the abilities section. In terms of the Fujioji clan bojutsu, it'd be nice if we could get a feel for what exactly would make it a distinct style? Nakazono may not have a grasp of it yet, but surely he has at least been drilled on the principles behind it for the day when he would supposedly begin proper training in the style? As an example, neither Mikoto or Ria have master Murakumo-ryu Ninpo or Mi-enshin Kaiho respectively, but there's an inkling there of what may come about in the future given future training. I'm kind of going to give you a break on the Focus & Skills section off the strength of the fact that he's gimmick at the moment is that he "sucks".


I've thought long and hard over this and I've come to the conclusion I have no idea what you want from me. You use the word "distinct". I find myself unable to make a "distinct" style because I have no reference within the Naruto universe of any bojutsu fighting other than what the Third Hokage does. And I think the Fujioji clan is already different than that because of the size, shape, and usage of the bo staff. If there's nothing to compare it to how can I make it distinct?

You also mentioned "an inkling of [what's in store]". What are you looking for? A list of unique Fujioji techniques? Are you looking for a rough outline (E.G. Fujioji's use their natural chakra type to augment their abilities. Some who use fire add fire attacks while attacking with their bo staves to add more damage.)? Because all the Fujioji clan does is use ninjutsu with their bo staves. Most probably use their bo staves over ninjutsu sometimes. So I'm not really sure what you're looking for in terms of what's to come.

FYI- Totally not upset/angry or anything. Just not getting what you want.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by RyoRyoRyoken
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<Snipped quote by RyoRyoRyoken>

I've thought long and hard over this and I've come to the conclusion I have no idea what you want from me. You use the word "distinct". I find myself unable to make a "distinct" style because I have no reference within the Naruto universe of any bojutsu fighting other than what the Third Hokage does. And I think the Fujioji clan is already different than that because of the size, shape, and usage of the bo staff. If there's nothing to compare it to how can I make it distinct?

You also mentioned "an inkling of [what's in store]". What are you looking for? A list of unique Fujioji techniques? Are you looking for a rough outline (E.G. Fujioji's use their natural chakra type to augment their abilities. Some who use fire add fire attacks while attacking with their bo staves to add more damage.)? Because all the Fujioji clan does is use ninjutsu with their bo staves. Most probably use their bo staves over ninjutsu sometimes. So I'm not really sure what you're looking for in terms of what's to come.

FYI- Totally not upset/angry or anything. Just not getting what you want.


Maybe this is me getting hung up on the fact that Naruto is a shounen anime/manga, but I guess the easiest way to explain what I'm asking for is "Is there anything that makes Fujioji clan bojutsu different from anybody else using bojutsu?"
Now, I'm not going to press the point if there isn't anything particularly special about their particular brand of combat beyond the fact that bojutsu's underutilized among shinobi. But yes, things like potential trees within the technique incorporating nature transformations, or other potentially "anime" usages of a bo staff would apply if that were the direction you intended to go. But again, I'm not going to force it if there isn't anything there.

Hopefully I explained myself a little better. Apologies for any confusion.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Little Bill
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gotta bump this thread somehow
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Matsuri
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Sorry for the huge delay, new ideas, writer's block and time constraints are being a total pain.
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Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Gowi
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Sorry for the huge delay, new ideas, writer's block and time constraints are being a total pain.

Haha, that is absolutely fine. I've been quite busy (and I've gotten poked due to it on RPG) myself, but hopefully this week is different.

EDIT:

@DeadBeatWalking — I will do a complete look over when you have finished your CS in full, but I did read a bit of it before realizing you had no jutsu list and things look up shaping nicely. I would also say I pretty much agree with what Ryo stated about the “pseudo-telepathic” communication.

@Sergeant — I do not have much issues going forward with your CS, I would probably say it is fine to move into the characters tab so we can start to get the gears moving on this RP.

@Indra — Good improvements. But Ryo is probably right that I’d be very wary of the fact—I just don’t see Kazuma allowing himself to get captured whilst the murderer of his wife was free, especially with an unlocked Mangekyou among other marque factors. I’d see him becoming a missing-nin over a prisoner. We probably should discuss options before accepting this part of the character. I don’t really have many poignant issues beyond this.
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Sloth
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  • So far so good. Honestly, the only part I'm iffy about is the pseudo-telepathy right now. (and maybe the slight spoiler?)


@DeadBeatWalking — I will do a complete look over when you have finished your CS in full, but I did read a bit of it before realizing you had no jutsu list and things look up shaping nicely. I would also say I pretty much agree with what Ryo stated about the “pseudo-telepathic” communication.


What the hell, I'll throw in my two cents.

Personally, with the restrictions presented, I don't see why Ninja Monks couldn't have a form of Ninshū based telepathy and/or a vague detect emotion sort of skill. While I know this is an alternate universe and all that, hear me out. Multiple characters throughout the series have commented on the "feel" of someone's chakra, even when they themselves weren't sensor types. The Yamanaka Clan developed a hiden technique centered around telepathy. The Hiden part is important. Remember that, theoretically, anyone can learn how to utilize hiden techniques rather than it being a genetic thing a la Kekkei Genkai. Ninshū, and, presumably by extension, Ninja Monks, predate ninjutsu and it seems the connection of spiritual energies and emotional understanding are two of the primary tenets of the Sage's (IE: Ninja Monks') teachings.

The teachings of ninshū were meant to give people a better understanding of themselves, as well as others, and lead the world into an era of peace

Hagoromo exemplified his teachings by distributing chakra meant to "connect" people's spiritual energies with one another. It would allow people to understand each other without communication and pray for one another's safety.
Narutopedia's Ninshū Page


Now, if an explanation for it being a "Monk Only" thing is needed since "Ninshū is just archaic ninjutsu" or whatever, perhaps the way the monks utilize it is through their unique Monks Only Chakra. Or perhaps the Yamanaka have simply refined the technique to an absurdly high rate, seeing as they can apparently communicate with vast groups of people at once if they do it right, whereas, in this instance, Monks can only communicate with each other or those trained in Ninshū, which I imagine would be few and far between.

I dunno. I think it'd be a neato thing for Kodo to have. Anyway, I should probably be sleeping.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Sergeant
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@Sergeant — I do not have much issues going forward with your CS, I would probably say it is fine to move into the characters tab so we can start to get the gears moving on this RP.


I still need to make the changes RyoRyoRyoken wanted of me. But it's good to know I'm good on your end.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Little Bill
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howbout that ninja weather
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Sergeant
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I'm gonna try and finish my CS some time this week. Sorry it's taking my so long, I'm struggling with some RL stuff that's killed my muse? Mood? Creativity? IDK.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Little Bill
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Bumping in the hopes of getting some Nublood. Also, because I want to get closer to page four.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Gowi
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Yeah, we need a LOT more genin to make this work with the jonin teams we want.
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Aqua
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yeet
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Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Grey
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Moved.
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Little Bill
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Putting this here so I don't lose it/feel pressured to complete it. Behold.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Archangel89
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Is this still looking for genin? I've been lurking a bit and got interested lol
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