Gary Oak shouldn't have been surprised that his grandfather's appearance would have elicited such a response. The little kids that used to come by may have still bought his wise old man shtick in his current state, but for a group of adults who appeared to be around his age, it was transparent that the venerable professor was not what he used to be. The elder Oak even managed to scare one of the women to tears from the looks of things. [color=8dc73f]"Why couldn't this just be easy?"[/color] he muttered to himself.

He let out a sigh and turned back to the group assembled before him. [color=8dc73f]"Let me try this again,"[/color] he restarted. [color=8dc73f]"You are here, at the still-world-famous Oak Laboratory. Countless trainers have begun their journey here, including myself, the one and only Gary Motherfucking Oak. Don't you ever forget that name!"[/color] He pointed at each of the trainers standing before him to emphasize that last point. 

[color=8dc73f]"Anyway, this is where you officially get registered to try and take on the Kanto Gym System and eventually the Indigo Pokemon League. I am a part of that system, and Viridian City is the closest gym to Pallet Town, but don't challenge me. If you challenge me, I will stomp you like the insignificant Bug-types you lot are right now. Your best chance to get that first badge is to go through the forest and head to Pewter City. Challenge Brock. He's pathetic. Should be an easy target for... well all of you since you have an Oshawott,"[/color] he pointed at Ezra, [color=8dc73f]"And the rest of you are women, so that foolish virgin will probably give you badges just for gracing his presence. This is also where you get your Pokedexes. You can upload them as apps onto your phone if you have one, but these serve as your ID for the challenge, so don't lose it. Don't break it. Because we aren't flying new ones out all the way from Kalos just for stupid klutzes!"[/color]

[color=8dc73f]"So since I see six people, and I have six Pokedexes, just come up when I call your name and grab your device."[/color] Gary quickly flipped through his phone to get to his notes. [color=8dc73f]"OK... Vivian Aurora... Ezra Daly... Fary Nitashi... Karen Rose... Karen?"[/color] While the first three Pokedexes were quickly claimed, no one was budging on the fourth one. It was way too early for Lilith to let the glamour fall from her mysterious cloak. Especially with her cursed birth name. [color=8dc73f]"Kaaaaaren? Really living up to your name aren't you, huh? Well you've seen the manager. Go complain. See if I care. We'll process of elimination this anyway... Lizbeth Rowe... Hana Tatsu-"[/color]

[color=gray]"Good news Trainers! I have your Pokedexes for you right here!"[/color] Professor Oak burst back into the main hallway with a small shoebox in his hands. [color=gray]"My apologies for running off like that! I just had to go get your brand-new Pokedexes! I made them myself you know!"[/color]

[color=8dc73f]"Gramps, what the hell are you doing?"[/color] Gary was visibly pissed off now. [color=8dc73f]"We've been over this! You don't make the Pokedexes anymore! Not after gave a 10-year-old a device that just consisted of your grocery lists and some damn dirty limericks!"[/color]

[color=gray]"Nonsense! These are my finest inventions!"[/color]

Gary quickly rifled the box that his grandfather brought out. [color=8dc73f]"These are just iPods... with red nail polish all over them!"[/color] He clicked the button on one of them. [color=8dc73f]"And they're broken! Where did you even get these?!?"[/color] 

[color=gray]"I told you! I built them myself!"[/color]

Meanwhile, Lilith had attempted to use the distraction provided by the old man to try and sneakily acquire her Pokedex. However, the old man was too perceptive for her.

[color=gray]"Hello there!"[/color] Oak shouted at the Unovan. [color=gray]"Tell me, are you a boy or a girl?"[/color]

[color=cc5500][i]What an insult! How dare this senile coot even think I could be a boy?[/i][/color] Lilith was as irked as Gary was, and she let the old man know it. [color=cc5500]"That depends. Which gender would you prefer ends your over-extended life and feeds your soul to the flames?"[/color]

[color=gray]"Hah! You've got spunk! I like that!"[/color] Professor Oak didn't even seem to register Lilith's needlessly dark answer. He was too busy slapping his grandson on the back. [color=gray]"This is my grandson! He's a trainer just like you! Um..... what was his name again?"[/color]

Gary's face was beet red as he blurted out, [color=8dc73f]"You fucking......SHIT!"[/color] He turned to the assembled masses. [color=8dc73f]"NO ONE ANSWER HIM! THAT'S AN ORDER!"[/color]

But it was too late. [color=gray]"I remember now! His name is Shit! That's right!"[/color]

[color=8dc73f]"No! No it's not! You fucking know it's not!"[/color]

[color=gray]"Shit! Calm down! No need to yell! Besides, now that these trainers have their Pokemon and Pokedexes, our work is done! Let them go explore, Shit!"[/color] Oak waved his arms in the air. [color=gray]"Now go discover the wonderful world of Pokemon!"[/color] He ended with a flourish before the mop atop his head slowly slid off and plopped on the ground. With that he turned away and headed to the back of the lab.

Meanwhile, Gary was in a Primeape-like level of rage. [color=8dc73f]"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, OLD MAN!"[/color] He turned, his head in his hands as he tried to control himself. [color=8dc73f]"IT TOOK ME THREE YEARS TO GET HIM TO STOP CALLING ME DOUCHE![/color]

[color=gray]"Shit! Shit! I need your help! The toaster isn't accepting my bagel!"[/color]

[color=8dc73f]"I... I can't. I just can't fucking deal with this anymore. I'm getting the fuck out of here. No one come to the Viridian Gym! I am in no mood to face any of you pathetic scrubs! You knock on my door, you're getting fed to my Arcanine, dig! Later, losers!"[/color] Gray huffed out the frontdoor before summoning his Pidgeot to fly him away from this nightmare factory.

Meanwhile, with her Pokedex safely tucked away in her bag, Lilith just stood there, blinking at the display from one of the top gym leaders in the country. Sia stood sentry on her shoulder, looking none the wiser considering everything that had happened. [color=cc5500][i]Well, I think I finally found something I'd want to be called less than my actual name...[/i][/color]

Quickly thinking, she scooped up the remaining Pokedex and handed it to the woman who she was talking to earlier. [color=cc5500]"I believe this is yours. Shall we all get the hell out of this place before the old man decides to set this place on fire?"[/color]