Guess I need to do one myself.

Name: Kelly Sheehan
Age: 26
Gender: Male
Appearance: [hider=Sheehan][img=http://images2.chictopia.com/photos/jaybyrd/10324699898/white-old-navy-cardigan-red-urban-outfitters-tie-green-thrifted-shirt-blue_400.jpg][/hider]

Day Job: Bartender/ manager at Fiddler's Green

Bio: Kelly Sheehan is not a guy you would think of as a criminal. With his weedy frame and penchant for ties and cardigans he looks more like a coffeehouse hipster than anything. Indeed, he comes from a moderately wealthy family in Blue Springs, growing up in a home that never lacked for food, clothing, or the latest gadgets.

Not that he was happy. His father, a workaholic attorney, was never afraid to make his constant disappointment in Kelly known, occasionally with the back of his hand. His mother, a practicing psychologist who could solve anyone's problems but her own family's, flitted between various affairs and constantly ignored Kelly aside from writing him a check once in a while. Occasionally, at school, he took out his anger on others- rarely with physical violence, but more often by spreading rumors and malicious gossip. Kelly grew up angry, disaffected, and used to easy money- a dangerous combination.

When the time came, Kelly attended Pittsburg State University in Pittsburg, Kansas. There he studied business administration. Finally out from under the thumb of his abusive father, Kelly still carried on much the same as before, except now he was "college poor". With only a limited stipend from his dad, Kelly was on the lookout for various ways to supplement himself. Cash won in poker and craps games on campus went a little ways. But the real jackpot came when Kelly discovered one of his professors sleeping with one of the students. The professor, seeking to keep Kelly quiet, offered him an interesting opportunity: a partnership. The professor, it turned out, had a few shares in a local pharmacy and often skimmed off a few items to sell. Oxycodone, caffeine tablets, various study drugs, the kind of things students might want. If Kelly kept quiet about the affair, he could have a share of the profits.

Kelly did him one better, becoming active as a dealer on campus. He was as persuasive as he was careful, increasing sales on campus and keeping an extra layer of anonymity between the buyers and the source. Both men prospered, eventually moving into anabolic steroids for the athletes on campus and even small quantities of morphine. While Kelly's bankbook looked good, his grades suffered and he had to put in an extra two years at college. He didn't care, the thrill of getting away with it all was intoxicating.

The elder Sheehan disagreed, finally just cutting off his son. No one was there when he walked at graduation.

The job market wasn't so great, and young men who took six years to get a business degree from a small Midwestern college were not exactly in high demand. He had been careful to avoid ostentatious spending, and had carefully saved most of his money. It was enough for him to live comfortably for a while. But Kelly thought he was too smart and too talented to just hang out in Pittsburg, Kansas, so he packed up and headed for KC, simply because he knew the town.

When no high-paying corporate jobs materialized, Kelly managed to humble himself enough to apply as a bartender at Fiddler's Green. The owner didn't even bother to look at his resume or ask more than a few perfunctory questions at his interview, and Kelly was quickly hired. To the owner (who shortly retired to Florida), Fiddler's Green was just another on a list of properties he owned. To Kelly, it was a massive opportunity. Getting the place running a little better with his business acumen, Kelly also took the liberty of starting an illegal poker game in the basement. For a small fee, he happily turned a blind eye to whatever shady dealings went on in the corner booths. 

The money is trickling in, slow and steady. But Kelly would prefer a wave. And Kelly wants a good thrill. 

We could be doing better, right?