At last we will have revenge on those who hold us back! *raises pitchfork and lets out a battlecry

We could have a random, never before seen character named Sir Sparklyhooves the Unicorn who stampedes in on a rainbow and stabs all inactive characters with his horn. He's one of the most powerful beings in existence so nobody can withstand his might once he sets his sights on you. He can then allow active characters to ride on his back as he teleports to a new location and whoever comes into contact with his tears completely heals you. That solves all the current plot problems. :lol