I've, um. Wanted to play this ship for a while.
[STATUS: Done, though I want to make the bios a bit better.]
~o~0~o~

[b]\+Ship Name:[/b] NSEA Protector II
[hider=Picture and Blueprints][img=http://www.sunwardhobbies.ca/sites/default/files/imagecache/product_full/9004.jpg][img=http://www.questarian.com/Blueprints/IM778546TYRADA/protector/PV1-0TOP.gif][img=http://www.questarian.com/Blueprints/IM778546TYRADA/protector/PV1-0FRONT.gif][img=http://www.questarian.com/Blueprints/IM778546TYRADA/protector/PV1-0SIDE.gif][img=http://www.questarian.com/Blueprints/IM778546TYRADA/protector/PV1-0BOTTOM.gif][/hider]

[b]\+Ship Class:[/b] "Evolution" Heavy Cruiser

[b][url=http://galaxyquest.wikia.com/wiki/Protector]\+Ship Wiki Link[/url][/b]

[b]\+Ship Specs:[/b]
[u]•Dimensions[/u]
-Length - 488m
-Beam - 402m
-Height - 82m
[u]•Weaponry[/u]
-Resonance cannon battery (4x) - Fires clouds of gas and excites subatomic particles to produce a devasting (if short-ranged) shockwave. 
-Gannet magnets (2x) - A focused penetrative electromagnetic burst designed to disable computers and overload electrical systems
-Pulse catapults (2x)- Chucks localized subspace energy pulses that misalign matter on detonation. Remarkably inaccurate, as they follow strictly ballistic trajectories.
-Quantum rockets - Rockets armed with quantum disentanglement warheads. Upon detonation, the target usually fails catastrophically in some manner around the detonation area. There is a chance, however, that no particles in the area are entangled, rendering the weapon a sub-par explosive.
-Blue particle cannons (8x, 6 fore, 2 aft [can be configured to blue or red]) - Gigawatt ultraviolet lasers accelerate a magnetic packet of energetic subnuclear particles to near lightspeed, giving this literal cannon quite a punch.
-Red particle cannons (8x 6 fore, 2 aft [see above]) - In this less-used variant, [i]infrared[/i] lasers accelerate energetic subnuclear particle packet. Aside from a differently-colored [s]special effect[/s]beam, the red particle cannons require much less power, at the cost of decreased damage due to destructive wavefront interference.
[u]•Defenses[/u]
-Plasma Armor - A protective sheaf of plasma, magnetically restrained to local space near the ship. It tends to absorb the energy of projectiles by melting them, and if the chemical composition is correct, it can even absorb electromagnetic-based weaponry. Too many hits, however, can disrupt the delicate chemical composition or electrical balance, causing the armor to disperse (though it can be re-formed).
[u]•Ship Gadgets[/u]
-Quantum flux drive - Unrefined Beryllium (in spherical form) is used as quantum resonance substrate (that is, fuel) to power the ship's FTL drive. This drive pushes the ship FTL in [i]normal space[/i] to speeds of up to Mark 15.
-Turbo - Jumping into hyperspace (for under one minute, or else!) gets the ship up to Mark 20.
-Digital Conveyor - Teleporter. Dices you up into cubes, demolecularizes the cubes, and then remolecularizes them at the digital conveyor platform. Or vice-versa.
-Food Replicators - Replicate food. Can be programmed for pretty much anything.
-Translator Circuit - seeks out matching patterns in neural structure to determine meanings
-Computer - Incredibly neutral ship AI. Only accepts vocal commands from Gwen Demarco.
[u]•Personal Gadgets[/u]
-Ion Nebulizer - Laser guns. Operates on the same principle as a particle cannon, only on a much smaller and less-devastating scale.
-Ion sheild - Personal shield. Far more effective at stopping energy than projectiles.
-Vox box - Essentially cell phones with virtually unlimited range. Still can be jammed, however.
-Appearance Generators - Holographic projectors that can be pre-programmed to reasonably approximate another individual's (even of a different species!) appearance. Creating new templates takes a great deal of time, and all of the ones on the [i]Protector II[/i] are set to humans. The Thermians all use them to avoid their own upsettingly-octopoidal apperance.
[u]•Surface Pods[/u] - Small shuttles with six seats and a very small cargo bay.
- Hyperpulse thruster system - a sublight propulsion system small enough to fit beneath the pilot's chair.
- Autopilot - what it says on the cover 

[b]\+Galaxy Quest in a nutshell:[/b]
In the movie [i]Galaxy Quest[/i], the Thermians ([url=http://img3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20100424113953/aliens/images/thumb/b/b3/Thermian.jpg/300px-Thermian.jpg]a horrifically-tentacled octopoidal race[/url]) have received Earth's TV program transmissions. Unfortunately, any form of deceit - including [i]acting[/i] - is a completely foreign concept to the Thermians. So when their planet is in danger, they shanghai the crew featured in the 20-years-old "historical record" [i]Galaxy Quest[/i] - a cult-hit science fiction series. Thus the hapless (and completely washed-up) actors, most of whom just want to be rid of the series, find themselves on a functioning replica of the NSEA [i]Protector[/i]. Hilarity ensues.

[b]\+Pre-Departure Scene:[/b]
[hider=Hider]"Our former Commander was not... strong," Mathesar said.
 Jason really didn't like the sound of that. His delicious steak was slowly getting colder. It was still impressive to be here, in the real mess hall that actual aliens built to match the show that he'd starred in. He'd felt touched, especially during the tour earlier. Seeing the entire crew in the barracks salute him - it made Jason feel like he'd actually done something worthwhile. He just wanted to give that feeling back to people, and was very thankful for this opportunity to do so.

The mess hall was full, yet strangely quiet. Aside from his fellow crew's table, very little talking took place. It was probably an alien thing.

"Former... Commander?" Jason finally asked. He'd been avoiding that question in his own head, but he had to know what'd happened to the man previously occupying his position.

"I'm sorry," Mathesar said, "You deserve to be shown." Mathesar nodded to another Thermian crewman, who pushed a button. A section of the wall moved aside, revealing a large viewscreen. Shakily, with a lot of static and white noise, an image appeared. A Thermian, sans appearance generator, was strapped to a table. Blue blood was everywhere. "The tape was smuggled off of Sarris' ship. Originally, one of our own tried to lead."

On screen, the former Thermian commander was brutally tortured, letting out hair-raising screams. Reality crashed down around Jason. This had been harmless fun to him before, but now this was more serious. Now they had to stay. There were important factors to consider. HIs fellow actors' shocked faces said otherwise, however. More telling was when they suddenly got up and left the table, running out the mess hall into the passageway.

Jason was shocked for a moment, facing Mathesar, whose jaw was trembling despite his brave attempt to smile after the torture scene that just played out on widescreen. There was a bright flash of light — maybe the ship had just dropped out of the turbo boost? — and then Jason got up and ran after his crew. It wasn't right! Here they were, an opportunity of a lifetime, and they got up and left without stopping to consider their options.

"Wait a minute, guys, come on. Hold on a minute. You can't just leave; give me some time to think!" Jason said.

Alexander glared at Jason as he turned down the next passageway. "He wants to 'think'," Alexander said.
"No, Jason. That's a wrap; there's nothing to think about!" Tommy exclaimed.

Guy suddenly grabbed on to Jason's arm.
"I'm not even supposed to be here," Guy said. "I'm just Crewman #6. I'm expendable. I'm the guy in the episode who dies to prove that the situation is serious. I gotta get out of here! I gotta—"

"Commander!" Mathesar said, running up from seemingly nowhere. Well, Jason needed to talk to the alien anyway; it was clear that his crew was having none of this.
"We gotta prepare the pods for my crew's departure," Jason said, disgusted with the others' lack of sense.
"Begging your Commander's pardon, sir, but we cannot launch pods at the moment. Earth… and indeed the entire galaxy… seems to have disappeared."
"What‽" Tommy said.
"Your presence is required on the command deck," Mathesar said. "The assistance of Dr. Lazarus will be especially invaluable in determining the cause of this anomaly."
"Wonderful," Alexander said sarcastically.[/hider]

[b]\+Notable Crew:[/b] 
[hider=Jason Nesmith as Commander Peter Quincy Taggart][img=http://www.mobygames.com/images/portraits/large/1203411116-00.jpg]
Plays the Commander on the [i]Galaxy Quest[/i] TV show.[/hider]
[hider=Alexander Dane as Dr. Lazarus][img=http://stat.ameba.jp/user_images/20101230/22/otobokemahchan/4a/ad/j/o0267040110951215689.jpg]
Plays Commander Taggart's alien advisor on the [i]Galaxy Quest[/i] TV show.[/hider]
[hider=Gwen Demarco as Lt. Tawny Madison][img=http://theruffstuff.files.wordpress.com/2011/03/gwen.jpg]
Plays the token female bridge bunny on the [i]Galaxy Quest[/i] TV show.[/hider]
[hider=Tommy Webber as Lt. Laredo][img=http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/236x/10/39/f5/1039f5d8f187cefea26d52c68d19c2c6.jpg]
Plays the navigator and gunner on the [i]Galaxy Quest[/i] TV show.[/hider]
[hider=Fred Kwan as Tech Sgt. Chen][img=http://www.helbing.info/img/gq/chen.jpg]
Plays the chief engineer on the [i]Galaxy Quest[/i] TV show.[/hider]
[hider=Guy Fleegman as Crewman #6][img=http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/22500000/Guy-Fleegman-positive-thinking-22526510-270-363.gif]
Played a redshirt in one episode before getting killed off on the [i]Galaxy Quest[/i] TV show.[/hider]
[hider=Mathesar][img=http://www.halforums.com/xenforo/attachments/mathesar-jpg.3740/]
Leader of the Thermians, the aliens that shanghied the actors into this mess.[/hider]
[hider=Laliari][img=http://media-cache-cd0.pinimg.com/736x/6d/d3/77/6dd377264415b32865c7ceeb0ba63a2f.jpg]
Thermian, has a thing for Fred.[/hider]