Eve wiped the sweat from her bow and took her hair down from the tight military style bun she had been forced to wear it up in, it was sadly pretty greasy and while naturally wavy it was a little limp from the last…how many weeks had it been? With soap and clean water in short supply she had the choice of food or bouncy pretty hair. Oddly enough her hair lost but she wasn’t going to cut it, “I love your hair! It’s so pretty” A sweet, high voice spoke from behind her right ear, divulging into giggles not a moment later, Eve knew better than to look but her body responded immediately and her heart broke anew. With a heavy hearted sigh she made her way back inside and dropped off her bow, arrows and knife before punching out and nodding to the man covering her shift.

She wasn’t overly a team player but then scavengers and border guards were both more or less solo jobs, it was why she’d taken them when she’d gotten to this place, It was fun, all those years those men had come, painting Barrowside as a paradise, yet her first and lasting impression was far from it. Though what could she do? It wasn’t like she had anywhere to return to, or anywhere else really to go. As long as she kept her nose clean she had a nice cushy job, the enforcers kept people inside from playing up and security kept the walls safe, in all her years here she’d shot maybe half a dozen greys. Being a scavenger was a bit harder, a lot more risky but hell she’d managed the trek fron the farm to Barrowside alone and most of the time it wasn’t overly different. She had food, the lean pickings from her previous life meaning she didn’t often run out of tokens and was able to occasionally sneak one to the scruffy bony kids she saw on her way to Patrol. 

Those poor bastards deserved better, not here, they deserved grass like her mama had spoken about and blue skies, they didn’t deserve to ever be hungry at the very list. Though the system had its rules, its crazy ass unfair fucking rules. She’d been penalised rations and forced on double shift last time they’d caught her giving out her tokens. The weak got weaker and the strong got stronger and it always felt awful, it was those moments of clarity where she was almost glad Jess was gone, the girl had been too gentle for this fucked up world. Her hand found her heart where ripped sports bra held the lock of hair.

She was soon among people again, most kpt their heads down and got on with their work but kids were either dumb or braver than most and ran up to her chatting at her excitedly. One scruffy boy spoke about having dug in the rubble of a toppled building and finding the head of a teddy bear, he beamed at her like he’d hit the jack pot, “Well shit boy, you’re going to be better at scavenging than me!” She high fived him and he grinned a toothy grin at her while a couple of others told her about their day. By the time she was back at her little apartment she’d forgotten all about the stagnant system and that bloody letter.

The ashes of which seemed to goad her from the fire place, the whole thing left a sour taste in her mouth really. She was still undecided as she stripped down, tossed her uniform carelessly aside and pulled on her favourite (and only) outfit, jeans, comfortable boots and a top she’d scavenged up on one of her runs. They were her going out clothes, it was the social function tonight, alcohol, the only thing made this shit hole a bit more bearable but she still wasn’t sure she was going. She always went, it would be strange if she didn’t, yet if she went she’d be suckered into [i]hope[/i] and that was a dangerous thing. 
[i] “Imagine, one day we might be able to see the real stars Evie!”
“Don’t be stupid Jess. Why do you think that?”
“No reason, I just have [b]hope[/b].”
“Where’d you learn that word?”
“Mama’s dictionary, it means-“
“I know what it means, it means I’m not getting any sleep tonight.”
“What do you think we’re doing here Evie?”
“Same thing we do every day, try and survive long enough to die from hunger instead of mauled by those things.”
“There’s more to it than that Evie, there’s got to be. I feel it in my toes, you got to have hope Evie, you’ll see.” [/i]

Shaking her head she snapped out of the pleasant little memory and stood from her chair, she was going to go get drunk, Jess had now seen to that. Scooping up a very small handful of saved up tokens she slipped out of her apartment, down the hall and out into the street. She didn’t care about the rain and walked the distance from the apartment block to the social room enjoying the slightly refreshing yet burning sensation it gave her. She went straight to the bar, lay down a token, accepted the gratitude of some 5A who’d clearly spent a token or two already. Stare him down when he went to touch her and until he went away before accepting the drink from the bar tender, she didn’t move from the bar, instead she turned so her back was facing it, elbows on the rickety wood and took a carefully measured sip from the bottle.