If spam adopted me, who would be the two to raise me?

[b][u]Spamily[/b][/u]

Child1 & Hokage Soul Reaper King Lord Emperor Boss of Japanimu Land #200348383: Me
Aunt: Kaga
Blind Grandpa Confuses Everyone with Each other.: Giygas
Not It: Holmes
Creepy Uncle that Everyone Dislikes: Derp
Special Brother: Drago.
Winner of the Thread: Idle
Person who Moved in and Nothing is the Same Now: KB