[quote=Apokalipse]
Your writing is fine; but if I could offer a tip. It's all bunched together, so maybe making a few parts of it separate, by subject, would make it neater. Other than that, it looks fine. You are really good with showing a character's personality, and not telling.
[/quote]

This.

Though another good tip is to let Hector find a lightsaber in his next post. :D