I am very glad that you have learned to control your anger. But I still maintain there are some things that are offensive and should not be said by someone who wants to maintain polite friendships. I dont say the worst of those things, but I do blurt out a lot.

As far as the alcohol thing, what you're not seeing is that for some people, its not about logic, and it's not about what will kill them later. It's about what makes their lives seem livable now. People dont smoke, or drink, or do drugs because they think “Oh, this is going to be so healthy...” They do it because it's the only thing that makes life seem tolerable. Granted, I don't do those things. My vices are more eating too much and avoiding my problems via video games and the Internet. But I know full well that the only thing stopping me from getting drunk once a week out of frustration and stress is that I can't afford vodka, and cheap beer makes me sick.

I saw people at Tech that I KNOW were self-medicating. I knew a guy who studied constantly all week, and then on the weekend he was drunk or passed out from Friday afternoon to Sunday night. Most of the fraternity parties were just people sitting around drinking as well. He was an extreme case, but I doubt he was the only one who was doing it to deal with school stress.

But the thing is, many many people can't get help. I could write an essay on my experiences with the mental health system, going beyond even an ability to pay. Most counseling appointments are around 150 a pop, and want to talk about non-generic meds? Ahahahahaa... funny. If I hadn't had insurance at the time, I would have been paying 400 a month for one of my medications. Thankfully, the others were generics. Now that I don't have insurance, I can't even begin to afford it. Sorry, but at that point, alcohol is cheaper. Now, that's not counting the medical costs of liver disease later, but that's not going into most people's equations, because the idea is to get through the day now.

Maybe less people would have to turn to those vices if this country would get its head out of its ass on healthcare costs and the clusterfuck that is the medical system, to say nothing of the social stigma that comes with mental health issues. But since that's not going to happen, I'm just trying to point out that there is another side to it. 

As a psychologist, you probably already know all of this, which is why it's hard for me to understand how you can be judgmental about it. I'm not offended or angry, just confused.

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Apart from that, I dont see a problem with social drinking. It helps with social anxiety, and personally, I enjoy having a social excuse for my lack of inhibitions. Every time I've been seriously intoxicated, I've had a good time and haven't done anything dangerous or stupid. I also haven't gone overboard, never had a hangover, and I do remember the experience. The only time I really actually drink enough to even get drunk is at Defcon, because the alcohol is cheap or free, and it's socially acceptable. Besides, Thomas dragged me there two years in a row even though I don't have the background to understand the panels going on, so I just spend the time partying and drinking, like half the crowd does anyway. 

I appreciate the offer of help. I'll keep it in mind. But I dont want you to feel like you need to essentially do your job on your off hours.

Edit because I thought of something else later: Also, you talk about them spending less money and getting better... but, as you know, that doesn't exist for most mental illnesses. There's no "better." There's "let me play Russian roulette with my brain for a few years, spend thousands on medical costs for counseling and meds, and maybe, just maybe, my life MIGHT improve by a few centimeters."