[quote]Name:Alexander Fox Age: 24 Gender: male Ethnicity/Nationality: American mutt Former Unit: spec ops first class Role: Rifleman/other[/quote] Name, gender and ethnicity no big deal. Former unit, however, needs to be an existing unit - 'spec ops first class' is not something that exists like "2/75 Rangers" or "GRU Spetsnaz" or "Special Air Service." Not only that, no branch of service or idea if he worked for a PMC like Blackwater or what. Big blank. Rifleman, fine. But what about skillsets? [quote]Physical Description: Alexander looks a bit nuts. He has sky blue eyes and dirty blond hair, while his skin is an anonymous cacasion and extremely pale. He wears an old leather flight jacket, which has his own modern medlals on it.[/quote] I think it's scanty and needs to give a better idea of the man's height and weight, how he's built and any identifying scars. [quote]Skillset: -spec ops grade rifleman -above grade martial artists -above average hacker -average knifeman -average shot with sidearm[/quote] Nothing about what actual military training he's had. Schools attended or experience. This also is very scanty. [quote]History: Alexander was a fairly good black hat hacker when he was 16 and he made a fair amount of untraisable money, but eventually they caught him. But when they caught him he wasn't going after corporate assets, he was shutting down the bigst enemy of the US's military infrastructure. He was given the option of joining the military in return for anaminoty, they say how talented he was. So he fired his documentation and joined up where he trained as a normal soldier while still 'helping' American assets. After years of training he was able to get into the spec ops on normal merit. He was with them for years before he retired, it when he learned about this opportunity he knew his special skills could get him in, for a good amount of legitimate cash.[/quote] This doesn't even cover what he did while in the service or anything of that nature. No branch of service. Beyond that, it's somewhat hard to comprehend. I'm not sure how to even read "he fired his documentation." And, of course, there is no 'spec ops' in the US military. There's USSOCOM (UNited States Special Operations Command) and JSOC (Joint Special Operations Command) but they are headquarters units that host a variety of other units under their umbrella. So this needs a lot more work, and a better idea of where he came from within the US military -- you haven't even figured out what branch he joined. [quote]Psychological Profile: Alexander exhibits signs of assbergers, he is unsocialble and will not be able to form bonds with the others quickly. His tendency towards deviant behavior may become a problem, but he is brilliant an d is vary adaptable.[/quote] Asperger's. Something that disqualifies a person from military service, and probably out of Centurion as well. This also needs extra work -- it needs to explain what motivates him and makes him tick. Since you don't have any real history, such as parents and education, it's hard to make much from little. [quote]Equipment: See the character guide and notes on equipment. Equipment: Head/Face: SPECTRA-helmet, with night vision attachment Body/attire: leather wwii flight jacket over standerd black sec ops uniform Pack/Load Bearing Equipment: PLCE in black modified with a pouch for a lapton, rplaceing half the food/water and the entrenching tool -Belt: holds sidearm and combat.knife -Primary Weapon - -Sidearm - hi416 with auxilery iron sights, and the M26 MASS (Modular Accessory Shotgun System) -Grenades - two frag grenades -knife - standerd issue steel combat knife, in grey with a pres line painted on around the handle[/quote] Overall, you need to spell check what you write and make an actual effort. I wrote that in the rules because I am serious about it. Other people in the thread are also serious about it. The rule is there so that the rest of us aren't making a strong effort to spellcheck and grammar check and otherwise make sure we put forth our best effort while someone else is writing stuff that is badly spelled and hard to understand. This is what the Guild colloquially calls a 'high casual' roleplay. As the GM, my absolute minimum is that people have spellcheck and need to use it. I'm not saying this to be rude, but to be honest. I'm not sure if this is an RP you want to join and I'm not sure we can accommodate you because I am worried about the quality of the writing involved and making sure that everyone at least satisfies some of the basic requirements. I'd rather have that stated outright than to have the awkward situation of letting you proceed further when I don't think you're going to hack it with this RP. I'd rather lose someone before the RP starts than have to go through this after the RP's already begun.