Serena looked up at Sebastian, tears still streaming down her face, "How can I not listen to her, Sebastian, when we are saying the same things?" She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself a little, "Manipulative or not... there's truth in what she is saying...."

She ran her hand through her hair and sighed slightly, "I think... I think I need to lie down... alone for a little while," She looked up at Sebastian, "Just... calm myself a little."

She pulled away from Sebastian and walked into their bedroom. She stopped at the door for a moment before she closed it behind her. She knew if she left the door open that Sebastian would slowly follow. He'd want to comfort her, to hold her... That was something this loved about him but... Right now she just wanted to be alone... She didn't want Sebastian seeing her like this. She walked over to the bed and climbed in, the movie they had been watching was still playing filling the room with noise. She couldn't pay attention to it though, she was just too wrapped up in her own thoughts. She pulled the blankets up to her chin as she stared at the wall, just thinking and thinking and thinking. 

It was sometime later that she pulled her eyes from the wall and rolled over, trying to move away from the thoughts. Sebastian had told her it wasn't her fault... But something inside of her said otherwise. Tears were still slipping down her cheeks but she was quieter now, she didn't want Sebastian to hear. Her eyes fell on the stake that Gunner had given her. It just sat on the bedside table where she left it when they returned, wanting to forget about it. It was like it stabbed her through the heart, a reminder that she had failed... That all of this... could have been avoided had she not wanted to prove herself still capable of being a guardian. She stared at it for sometime before she sat up and took it into her hand. She stared at the sharp point for sometime before she pressed it to her wrist and dragged it across her skin, cutting it open. For a moment, the pain overrode everything. The guilt and the sadness, it slipped away for a moment. However, when she finally stopped, she sat there and stared at her bloodied arm and gasped. She had multiple jagged gashes on her wrist, all of which were bleeding profusely. She tossed the stake across the room and shook, bringing her hand to her forehead as she looked at her forearm. 

She was sobbing again as she watched the blood pour down her arm. She didn't know what made her do it but suddenly the threat of insanity that she had been living with... The fate of St. Valdimir's guardian became so real... Between Sebastian's darkness, his mother, and the spirits from before it had all become too much. She slowly climbed out of the bed... It was all just too much. Her eyes fell once more on the stake that she had thrown to the floor and the thought that popped up in her head scared her more than any Strigoi, "Sebastian!" She called before she nearly ran to the door. She stood the doorway, bleeding, "Something's wrong with me," She sobbed as she cradled her bleeding arm.