I can't manage typing accents yet. I'm always worried that it's going to look way too weird and sound completely off when spoken. 

But yeah, I definitely don't know that much French, and I don't trust google translate very much when I can avoid it. This is mostly from my memory of Italian. 

Granted, my grammar is probably awful (sorry about that), but I'm working on it. Eventually, I'm sure I'll be able to write it well enough so actual Italian speakers will be able to see it without laughing themselves into a coma or something, though.