[quote=@Leolycan]
[@Penultimate_Pi]

Sorry. I'm more than open for you to pm the write up, so I can look over it for furture references, but I'm withdrawing from this specific one. Thanks again for the offer, and thanks ahead if you send the feedback.
[/quote]

[quote=@Leolycan]
Eh, the point is I'm not welcomed here. As such, I'll be withdrawing. Thanks for your time.
[/quote]

No. Absolutely untrue. Lycan. This is as much a learning experience as it is an rp. You don't have to leave just because you think you are below the skill level. You made an attempt at a CS and it ended up flawed. All cs go through that time and all players go through the same time themselves where they must learn and adapt and become better writers. I apologize for coming across as an ass and making you feel unwelcome. I admit that in my time as a roleplayer I have become a lot more cynical than most people and it's impacted a lot of experiences due to brashness and confrontationalness that was built over years of seeing writers make mockeries of the spirit. There are a lot of very good writers out there, many of which are surrounding us now. It takes a lot of criticism and harsh lessons to become the best writer possible as it's not something one can learn over night.

Please, I invite you to sit down and try again and let us walk you through what makes the difference between a "Gary stu", a good character, and a great written persona.