Sana gazed up into his eyes as she watched the confusion set in and the knot returned to the pit of her stomach; he truly didn't know what her biggest fear was, that or it just had not dawned on him yet. She stood there, her heart pounding in her chest as he stepped closer and she tried to form the words to help him understand. She wasn't sure how to go about it. Sana was not a particularly delicate woman and when frustration set in she had a tendency to snap or ramble or both. She didn't want to hurt him with her words but there was no way to put it delicately so she opted for the most direct route. It was perhaps the most painful but at lesst it would be over with quickly, at least she hoped it would.


	"I..." she started and felt herself begin to stumble over her words. Taking a deep breath she just let it all out as quickly as possible. "I am afraid, after seeing how you acted around Ariana and seemed to block everything out, including my pain and my change, which to be honest is pretty obvious considering I can cast magic now and you know very well that is something I have never been able to do. But yeah, I am scared of you. You had a wife and a family before and well, I was supposed to be a courtesan. Well, duh, you know that, why I am repeating it now it beyond me. I dunno, effect? Well yeah, you know I never wanted to be a replacement to your wife and that's a fear I live with every day... Cause, well if she hadn't died we wouldn't be here today. So damn it, I always feel like I was a fluke, you know. That, be alone if this horrific event hadn't happened. But yeah, now Ariana is here and you're acting like this whole fuzzy warm and cozy family. Which is sweet, but it scares the fuck out of me. I mean well damn it, we never spoke marriage or kids or anything, hell you've never asked me to marry you or even said you loved me. I mean I think you love me but even a brute woman like me wants to hear it. I mean hell, you're the love of my life and I'm maybe runner up? Yeah, that's right, I love your stubborn thickheaded ass. Deal with it. And I'm scared now that Ariana is here, well that this whole family scenario is going to play out and I'll never know if it is because you truly love me or it is just because I am some fucking replacement and you are just tying to get back what you lost and live in the past. So yeah, I'm scared, petrified. Well not petrified cause I am standing here rambling in the rain but terrified. That's why I am scared of you, I'm scared in the end I will just truly end up being the courtesan I have been trying to never be. The second choice, the fill in. The replacement."


	Sana rambled everything off so quickly, stumbling over  words here and there but she managed to get it out. Perhaps there was more, perhaps not but that what was forefront in her mind and what needed to be dealt with first. She braced herself for the retort, what he would say or do. She was afraid he would yell, or be angry but most of all she was afraid he would walk away or confirm her fears. She stood there though as the rain poured down, ready to take what ever was thrown at her.