Rhonda’s story had grown more outrageous than the first time Deidre had heard it. “It started when I went to the lotto station. I was going to get my ticket—I play the mega lotto jackpot like it’s no-one’s business, and the idiot behind the counter printed out the wrong ticket. I wanted the numbers 08-16-29-3B for my birthday and old apartment number.” She glanced over towards Deidre, wondering if the young girl was going to call bullshit on the age that the woman had labeled herself. She sure as hell wasn’t 29, and last time she told the story, it had been a bit outlandish to suggest that she was in her mid 30’s. 

Deedee didn’t care if Rhonda wanted to make herself sound more youthful, though, and merely nodded her head slightly to show that she was still listening. “…So here I am, walking out of the station with two tickets in hand, when this car comes flying by. One of my tickets is [i]ripped[/i] from my hand, and goes flying across the street. I look both ways, being the conscientious citizen I am, and then make my way across the road to get my ticket. Because… Of course, the one that flew out of my hand was the one I had actually [b]wanted[/b] to buy when I went in the blasted place. Anyway, there is a light nearby so the traffic is stopped anyway. I am just a few steps away when a car pulls up and blocks it completely. Now, I am a pretty even-tempered person,” –she said this flinging her fork in the air, and sending a small bit of food out in another direction. Deedee followed the piece of mashed potato and then looked back to her roommate, chuckling quietly to herself at the prospect of her roommate being anything like even-tempered. 

“But even I had grown a little frustrated at the fact that the…thick-striped potbelly simply HAD to get a couple inches closer to the red light.” She let out an exasperated sigh and took a sip of the drink in front of her. The younger one, Penny, looked utterly confused, as did Lola. This story was…completely different from some of the other ones they had heard from Rhonda before. Perhaps she was simply arrested for being a compulsive liar…
“How did you know the driver was thickly striped?” Penny asked, speaking up. Rhonda’s death glare sufficiently shut her up, however, and the not-29-year-old continued. Her story went on, such that she asked the driver very politely if the vehicle could move so that she could get her ticket. And according to this version, the driver screamed at her and called her a useless blank slate. It was a rather harsh insult, and Rhonda went so far as to whisper when it came time to translate the man’s words. Lola raised one eyebrow skeptically, but Rhonda’s were threatening to escape her head entirely. She nodded solemnly, as if it pained her to cast the higher-tiered man in such a negative light. 

“I don’t know what compelled him to speak such harsh words, I really cannot say. I began to back away from the driver’s side of the car, when my foot slipped a bit in a puddle. I reached out to steady myself so I didn’t fall, and my hand must have grazed the wax coating on his custom-painted vehicle. And that man…simply lost his mind. He pulled out a crowbar, and started chasing me around his car. In trying to strike me, he hit his own car over and over again.”

“Where did he get the crowbar, Rhonda?” Deedee hadn’t meant to interrupt, but even she was perplexed by all this. The rest of the table was as well, silent in suspense/disbelief/a little of both. 

Rhonda turned to Deedee with a slightly condescending gaze, as if to say that Deirdre simply wasn’t grown-up enough to understand these things. “You don’t keep a crowbar in the driver’s side of your car?” She asked.

Deidre’s eyes narrowed a little, having a difficult time gauging how serious her roommate was. “No… I don’t believe that I did…” She said slowly.

“Well you should have, considering what you were doing before you were arrested.” She scoffed. 

Deidre opened her mouth to respond, meanwhile Rhonda opened her mouth to continue her [i]never-ending[/i] story. Neither of them were able to speak, however, because a loud beeping sound let everyone know that the time for dinner was over, and they were to return to their rooms. “Guess we will have to finish this…next time. Gives you something to look forward to, hun.” She tapped Penny on the cheek and then hopped up, making her way over to the exit for people heading back to cell block C. Deidre shrugged slightly before turning to join her roommate. No point in upsetting the thick-stripes here by being slow to return… especially if she wanted to keep some of the few privileges she had here.