I havent faced my problem straight on for about 4 years and just think that it will eventually come but it doesnt i keep repeating what I do every day and don't see any change happening in the comming 4 years either. I told my mom but she just seemed to straight out ignore me about it right now. It makes me feel so bad and hate myself even more for what I am. I want change but the only way for me does seem to dissapear from the life I have now. Sorry for doing spamming this into a rp.