Iris felt the pressure around her windpipe disappear in an instant and she fell to the floor.  All of her weight hit her feet in a moment and her knees buckled, hands instinctively reaching for her throat as she collapsed even further into herself.  She wasn't quite prone, but damn near close as she lay completely still, taking in deep breaths and letting them out before her heart could even get the oxygen to her muscles.  [i]Control it,[/i] she ordered herself, clenching her jaw for a moment in concentration.  Her vision was still spotty and her head pounded from lack of oxygen.  Her inhales came in twos and threes, like sobs.  Ciscera's distaste for Tunay'ruk and magic was more than explained, but Iris knew...  she knew that the tigress had fought back - most others had lacked the willpower to resist.  While Iris had not been shut out from Ciscera's mind, the female had found a way to make the channel two-way.  Typically the other person had no way of knowing that Iris was even looking into them.  Either they were asleep, or hardly occupied with anything but their own pleasure.  It was interesting, the things that brought some to brothels.

However, Iris re-experienced her entire life from her village burning back to here again in a single moment...  Because Ciscera was too aggressive to just let it go and too stupid to understand what it meant.  Anger welled up inside of her - how dare that wretched woman invade her like that...  After having the gall to try strangling her...  How [i]dare[/i] she have the nerve to... to, wait... what was she doing?  Iris looked up and saw Ciscera sitting in a corner, staring emptily into space.  Had the tigress felt real empathy?  She furrowed her brow in concentration, sitting up and turning over onto her rear, leaning against the wall as she continued catching her breath.  The young fox leaned her head back and closed her eyes.  She knew exactly what Ciscera was feeling right now.  For a long time, Iris had felt it day after day.

"Countless times, Ciscera,"  She started, finally looking over, "I've thought... what if I could just go back...  What if I could be there again before the raid and evacuate my town, or help them prepare..."  She shook her head, "What if I could go back to that river bank and refuse them their...  heinous bath...  I didn't do it for double rations...  I hardly did it because I wanted to be alive...  I did it because I knew that I [i]needed[/i] to be alive.  Whether I'm meant for greatness isn't on my mind, I just knew that if I gave up there, then they would win.  They wanted me to say no.  I'd seen those two specifically on several occasions during that time in their... caravan.  They reveled more in killing than they did in sex.  To say no would have been all they wanted - to say I was disobedient and unwilling to cooperate..."  The girl sighed and looked sidelong, her eyes glazing over, "I visit that day, specifically...  You saw everything, but I know you lived that one in more detail than the others...  I visit that day every night...  It haunts me whenever I look into the eyes of not just any man, but of any person.  Be they Riversladian, Tunay'rukian...  I even see it in Shar, and I see it in you.

"Look...  I know that the men who did that, who put me here, were Riversladians."  Iris turned once more to look at the white tigress across the room, "But I don't hate Riverslade.  I don't even actually hate them.  I don't know what's in store for me now, but...  Those men will get theirs.  I've seen it, the karmic justice doled by the world, and I don't have to do anything to make it happen..."  The fox brushed off her clothes as she rose to her feet and took a few very slow, thoughtful steps toward Ciscera.  She looked down to the tigress and frowned - those eyes had seen and felt everything.  They were there to judge and feel everything that Iris had, but not with the same perception.  The tigress lived the events as though they had happened to her and she had no control over the vessel in which she traveled.  Iris crouched low and looked over the feline's face, searching for... something, though not even she knew what.

"Ciscera, be present.  Don't live in a past that isn't even yours to mourn.  Don't regret actions I didn't take to prevent being here.  I'm here because time is a valuable thing, but a few wasted, ruined years of life is better than bringing them all to a screeching halt...  for what?  Pride?  Dignity?  No, those are burdens of the soul."  The vixen smiled softly, though it contained pity.  "I have shame, but it's mine to carry and I'll be damned, [i]damned,[/i] if I let anybody else add to it save for me.

"I think you should rest, it looks like you've had a long day..."  She finally pointed out, "And I'm sure none of this really helped."  The fox offered a hand to her to help her rise and reach the bed, if she so chose.