[quote=@Catchphrase]
So, is my character accepted? Or did I not write it properly?
[/quote]

Gonna rescind the acceptance for now, we're going to discuss it some more. In the meantime, take a look at what I said before, also what Andro posted up here:
[hider=what i said before]
Fearful Presence probably won't work. Daemons would probably relish fear and get off on it.
Orks would just fite u more because you look stronger. Eldar think all humans are babies, and that you are just a slightly more serious looking baby. Dark Eldar would want to strap you onto a sex-table and stuff you with dildos even more. Tau would just shoot you from 8 miles away with Pulse Rifles. Tyranids are bugs. Necrons are metal skeleton terminators. I think I got all the major ones.
You could scare Cultists though. We'll be seeing a lot of those probably.

Chainswords are typically made of an Adamantium-Carbon alloy, for the teeth. Power armor, Astartes armor included, are typically made of Ceramite plating. So your average Chainsword tooth is likely stronger than your average piece of power armor, if you were to shoot it with a gun.

All Bolt Weapons fire explosive rounds, so you don't need to include that blurb. Reduced Recoil for a Bolt-weapon probably won't amount to much, especially for the bolt pistol. And increased fire rate would just make it harder to handle. But that's up to you.
[/hider]
also take this time to add more to your sheet, it's a little on the bland side. Get creative.

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[quote=@ClocktowerEchos]
[@Andromedai]Did he accept my CS? Just checking before I attempt an intro post.
[/quote]

It's accepted, kinda curious what a Hestia-Pattern Lasgun is, I haven't found anything on it.