Jared’s house was nice. Nothing special, nothing terrible. Just…[i]nice.[/i] As Rob entered he had remembered what Jane said earlier that day: [i]“Jared will let you guys change and shower at his house if you want. Pretty sure he'll let us crash there, too.”[/i] Without bothering to look the the man, Rob took him up on his offer. [hr] Upstairs, Rob, Sam, and Austin all claimed a guest bedroom as the guests milled about downstairs. They all brought up a night bag, and were looking forward to at least getting one decent night’s sleep after the party. As they had come up, Rob locked eyes with Jared, who seemed to give a nod of approval to them as he went down the stairs they climbed. Good enough for them. “We’re heading down,” Sam said as he and Austin exited in the room. “Need anything?” “I’ll be a minute,” Rob said as he pulled his shirt off, “thanks.” As they closed the door, Rob made his way over to the shower. He turned the faucet on and waited for the water to heat up as he locked the door and looked in the mirror. A recent lifestyle change was doing good for him; he looked healthy enough. Small but toned bands of muscle poked out from under the skin along his arms—his best feature. As he took off the rest of his clothes, he continued to look at himself. It was a sort of odd thing for Rob, if he wanted to admit it. To see yourself naked before you, in a mirror. When Rob was younger, and considerably less fit, he hated the sight of himself. It was shameful to see; disproportionate features on a frame too big for them. Now an adult, he seemed…typical. Normal. Real. It made him feel as if he was on the edge of youth, and tumbling off of it, without so much as an accomplishment to his name. It was these introspective thoughts that he typically kept either to himself or locked away in his journal. It was…weakness. It was in it’s own way shameful. It stopped Rob from moving forward. From being truly devoted. And as he took his shower, Rob let these thoughts melt away from him; pour off his skin and circle into the drain below him. Insecurity wasn’t an option. There was too much to do. After his shower, Rob wrote down everything he had thought of and done that day in his leather-bound journal, before locking it and putting it back into his bag. He then pulled out fresh clothes; slacks and a navy blue shirt. He rolled the sleeves and unbuttoned the top button as he made his way back downstairs and to the party. As he walked downstairs, he remembered something Jane said to him: [i]"Hey, uh, thanks for really trying during the song. It means a lot,” She nudged him as she said it, looking at him and giving him a smirk. Rob couldn’t think of what to say in the moment, and had only looked at her long after her eyes had diverted back to the road, before he turned back towards his own view. He knew she thought he was off today. But the truth wasn’t that Jane and himself were off because of anything the she had done. It was he that was off with his own self. He had been feeling…not himself for a while, and it was a thought he only had, for some reason… …when he looked at her.[/i] [hr] Hours passed and the house filled to the brim with other band members, friend-of-friends, and local fans smart enough to know of the party. As Rob drank, his vision blurred, and the number of people he talked to began to blur. Soon, his memory began to fade, in the middle of a conversation, no less. [i]Who was in front of him? A fan? The tech guy? One of Jared’s friends?[/i] Rob blinked his eyes and stared down at the floor. In front of his own bare feet (why was he still barefoot?!) was a pair of strappy heels. As he looked up, past the dress and necklace, he saw Adrianna, smiling, and it all flowed back into him. [i]So that’s who I’m talking to,[/i] he thought to himself. “You were saying about being ‘out-of-yourself’?” Adriana asked him, smiling. Rob looked around, noticing that he was somewhere deep inside the house; not the main room. Surrounding him were bongs and pills. The air was alive with tense conversations and weed. [i]How did he end up here? And why did he tell this girl about that?[/i] He played along, for there wasn’t much choice. “I don’t know,” he continued, “I just sometimes feel like, it’s not me, you know? Like, up there, I’m the drummer. I’m doing my job. But it isn’t me doing it? Right? God, this makes no fucking sense…” “No no,” Adrianna said, smiling, “it really does.” After a moment, she pulled a small bag out of her purse. “Do you [i]really[/i] want to feel out of your head?” It was all too much. Sensory overload. There was no turning back from here. For the first time in five years, Rob dropped acid. [hr] Rob ran back out to the main room, Adrianna in tow. He had to find Jane. Where was Jane? Everywhere he looked was more faces he never recognized. Finally he found her. Or…he thought it was her. Maybe. She was sitting with Jared. Or, someone that looked like Jared. Actually, he didn’t look much like anyone at all. Or really…any[i]thing?[/i] It didn’t matter. “Jane!” he shouted, as he sat near her. “Jane! Jane-J-Jane! …I’ve been looking for you, all night!” He turned to Adrianna. “What time is it?” She could only shake her head. She was just as high as he was. Rob made a face at her and turned back to Jane. “Look, sorry I’ve been all..” he started, and waved his hands in the air as if to signify “weird” to her, “…lately. That’s dumb of me. I’m dumb. I’m…I’m dumb. Right?” He looked to Adrianna for more support, but she clearly only wanted one thing from him. Even high, it was obvious. “So, so I’m going to go, okay? I’ll go…go journalize how fucking weird this is…I dunno, write a song or something.” Adrianna grabbed Rob, and began to pull him away. [i]Shit, she’s strong.[/i] [i]And why did he tell her about the journal. No one knows about that journal![/i] “I’ll catch you later?” He called out to her. He couldn’t read her face even if he wanted to. He couldn’t read anyone’s face at this point. He barely could climb up the stairs, even with Adrianna’s help. All he could think about is going back downstairs. — Rob’s face hit the bed as Adrianna closed the door behind him. As she came at him, the only thought he had was that he was sad we wasn’t going to remember what was about to happen.