[Collab post between me and [@IncredibleBee]]

Gene looked at Antonio, and saw that he was truly being earnest about his desire to help those still trapped in the city. He looked back at the shopping cart full of office supplies he had looted in the confusion. Gene had always wanted to have an MP3 player, and that prick Bob from HR was too busy either evacuating or [i]being dead[/i] to complain about Gene stealing it. He'd also taken a laptop, a shiny red stapler, three smartphones, and a shiny red stapler. After all, Gene reasoned, if the world was ending and you just got fired from your job, why [i]wouldn't[/i] you take whatever you can find?

However, the absolute most beautiful treasure Gene had looted on his driveabout with Antonio was a strange weapon he had picked off a corpse several blocks away from the office branch. Judging by the state the weapon's previous owner was in, he had valiantly sacrificed his life in a fight against some [i]thing[/i] to secure a safe exit for his comrades. Though hideously burnt and a little melted, the corpse was dressed in nothing but their street clothes. Perhaps this was an ex-Demon Hunter, or a weapon aficionado. Whatever he was, he had demonstrated far more honor and bravery than any other human he had seen today aside from Antonio. perhaps what was even more interesting was the Devil Arm he was carrying.

The Devil Arm itself was, on the whole, not very interesting. A rubber grip stuck on the bottom of a silvery-white rod tapering down to a sharp point. In all regards, it looked like a crude hybrid between a lightning rod and a short spear. When a button was pressed, the rod lit up with spidery crackles of white-hot crackles of electricity. Perhaps, if Gene wasn't a moron, he would be able to actually [i]use[/i] the electricity, but for the time being it was just a very fancy flyswatter. The fact that Gene would steal from someone with such honor and nobility filled him with guilt. Before being drowned out by his own self-importance, it made a very convincing argument for the merits of self-sacrifice and helping others. Gene frowned, and looked back to Antonio.

"[color=goldenrod]Dude, I've been with you from the start.[/color]" Gene said. "[color=goldenrod]There's a middle school like five blocks from here; the kids're probably still in trouble. If you wanna start with saving people, we'd better get moving![/color]"

The sight of a gleaming golden motorcycle, a burdened shopping cart lashed behind it, screaming down the road would have definitely turned some heads, but a roving melee between the forces of Heaven and Hell had proved to be far more interesting. Antonio had graciously offered Gene a seat, but Gene, being the humble sort that he was, opted to ride on the cart.

"[color=goldenrod]Hey, just drop me off by the cafeteria![/color]" Gene shouted into the wind.
"What? The wind's too loud!" Said Antonio, slowing to a stop.
"[color=goldenrod]The cafeteria, drop me off by the cafeteria![/color]" Gene shouted over the roar of an unbelievably powerful engine.
"What? Hang on, I'll turn off the engine!" Said Antonio, quietly shutting off his motorcycle. The familiar roar of holy engineering continued. Against his better judgement, Gene looked behind him.

The road behind him was filled with a blinding golden light. One that Gene had only seen once before. It was an Irenic, one of Laguna's very own vehicles. And it was coming straight for Antonio!
"[color=goldenrod]Oh, shit! Drive! DRIVE![/color]" Antonio's motorcycle started up and took off at a speed only possible through miraculous design. Godspeed took off down the street just barely quickly enough to avoid being crushed by the rampaging Irenic behind it, sparking a frantic chase through the streets.

Coming up on the middle school, Antonio realized he couldn't possibly drop Gene off without letting the Irenic catch up. Thinking quickly, he banked a sharp turn left. The cart lashed forward, throwing Gene into the air and straight through the topmost window in the front of the school. "Go with God, my child," Antonio called out. "It appears that I must be tested before I can join you!"

Gene's trajectory carried him not only through the window into the school, but downwards [i]through[/i] the school's floor. With a shower of tile flooring and dust, Gene landed in the school cafeteria. The cafeteria itself was eerily empty, bereft of even signs of a struggle. Discarded trays of food cooled in places where only a few minutes ago students probably sat. It seemed that whoever had been here had left as soon as the seal was destroyed. Before Gene could applaud his good luck, there was a sudden ghastly noise and the room was bathed in the smell of ozone.

A demonic portal opened itself in the middle of the room, and from out of it came a single hulking figure. Chunks of polished bone gleamed in the sunlight, and electricity freely crackled along its monstrous form. Gene certainly didn't know what it was, but to any educated demonologist they would immediately recognize it as a Blitz, a rare and extraordinarily powerful Devil. "[color=goldenrod]Oh, for [i]fuck's sakes![/i][/color]" said Gene, [url=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cLBAFJWbd30]immediately alerting it to his presence.[/url]

Before Gene could even raise his fists, the Blitz disappeared in a flash of light. The Blitz's enormous claw tore across the back of Gene's head, sending him crashing into an array of tables. Gene blearily got up to his feet just in time for him to be engulfed in a blast of concentrated lightning, sending him crashing straight into the wall. Gene readied a mighty strike just as the Blitz teleported in front of him, hoping to strike it in the solar plexus right when it thought it had the upper hand. As his fist collided with the Blitz, Gene very quickly realized that human flesh is a quite alright conductor when dealing with the amounts of electricity currently coursing through the creature [i]he was touching right now[/i]. Paralyzed by his incredibly poor judgement, Gene could not avoid the Blitz's backhand, and so was sent to the [i]other[/i] end of the room. Righteous indignation and a couple thousand Newtons of force went through Gene's head.

From a perspective borne of pain and repeated head trauma, Gene got a chance to think about his situation. [color=goldenrod][i]This was like that one time back at the power station,[/i][/color] Gene mused, [color=goldenrod][i]only the transformer's jumping around and hitting me a lot more this time. How'd I deal with it before?[/i][/color] The Blitz, not at all interested in seeing Gene's train of thought in motion, readied another blast of lightning. Gene idly tossed a tray of food at the Blitz, less out of any attempt to harm it and more in the interest of seeing how quickly it could melt the tray down. To Gene's surprise, the lightning arced [i]away[/i] from Gene and [i]into[/i] the tray! [i][color=goldenrod]That's it![/color][/i]

With newfound confidence, Gene chucked another tray at his opponent. Sure enough, another bolt of the monster's electric shield arced into it. It was a small step forward, but not nearly enough to count. Thinking quickly, Gene shattered a nearby table, and sent its debris Blitzward. The Blitz valiantly defended itself against the incoming storm of shrapnel, but could not stop a particularly hefty piece of wood and iron from striking it directly in the chin.

The Blitz recognized that it probably wouldn't win a battle at range, and teleported out of sight. Gene whirled around to face... the wall. The Blitz, cheekily hiding [i]above[/i] Gene, gave him a mighty whack about the head. Gene hastily rolled to the side, narrowly avoiding being crushed under the Blitz's weight. Gene continued rolling, avoiding a wicked stomp from his electric enemy, and found himself forced under the table. The Blitz leaped on top of the table, and readied a crushing blow.

With all his strength, Gene kangaroo-kicked upwards, sending a cloud of iron and wood into the Blitz's prone face. Gene capitalized on this good fortune and sent both dining chairs next to him straight up, forcing the Blitz backwards onto his behind.

Gene shot up to his feet, and faced the Blitz. Gone was the fiendish electricity, to be replaced with the raw, red flesh underneath. Gone was the Blitz's electric shielding and, with it, its main defense against Gene. With a wry smile, Gene clenched his right fist.

A blast of divine energy blew the Blitz off balance and partially blinded it, giving it no time to respond to a wicked uppercut from the God Hand. When the Blitz rebounded off the ceiling (taking several tiles with it), Gene quickly closed the gap and drove the God Hand into its flank. A flurry of withering blows rained down upon the stunned Blitz, hammering the gaps in its bony armor like a human jackhammer. Gene ducked under the Blitz's sweeping claws as it desperately fought to regain control, and righteously drove his fist straight into its groin. As the Blitz staggered back, Gene readied a vicious finisher. He reared back, put his hands together, opened his right palm, thrust it forward into the demon's chest, and...

The sound of the Blitz exploding in a shower of demonic power roared through the school. Though only a few dozen students and teachers had stayed behind instead of trying to find their own way to safety, they all came out in force to investigate such a worryingly loud noise. Gene, battered and bruised but still giddy at his own victory, welcomed the crowd of onlookers with a smile.

"[color=goldenrod]Yeah, there we go-- beat the baddie, rescue the townsfolk... I could get used to this![/color]" Gene muttered to himself. Gene addressed the crowd with an unerring sense of command, and spoke with no small amount of authority. "[color=goldenrod]Alright, everyone! You guys wanna get out of here, you gotta follow [i]my[/i] orders. Got it? Good! Alright, I got somebody coming over here soon [sub]I hope[/sub], so I need you all to stay out front. C'mon, move quickly![/color]"

[hr][i]Ten minutes later...[/i]
[hr]

Gene was quite glad that there was a school bus still around. He wasn't sure if he could fit a couple dozen people on a motorcycle, and he didn't really want to figure out how. He listlessly listened to the sound of Antonio's divine motorcycle, hoping that he had managed to kill--or lose-- that Irenic.

From a long ways off, Gene heard a low rumbling sound. One that, strangely, sounded vaguely like a [i]trumpet[/i]. Gene could easily recognize the familiar golden glow of Godspeed from a mile off-- Antonio was safe! Antonio pulled his sweet ride up next to Gene, and gave him a sly wink.

"[color=goldenrod]Good job getting here, dude. How'd you get away?[/color]" Gene asked.
"There was a... misunderstanding. I am truly blessed to have avoided the wrath of one of God's servants." Said Antonio, beaming.
"[color=goldenrod]Yeah? Turns out there was a demon in the school-- only a few people were left. They're all in that bus over there.[/color]"
Antonio put his hand on his chin and thought deeply. "Hmm... we [i]could[/i] escort it to safety! The only thing is... it probably won't be nearly as fast or maneuverable as my ride."
Gene scratched his head. A school bus would be a sitting duck in the chaos of the city. There had to be [i]some[/i] way to make it as fast as Godspeed, but how? Gene's eyes fell on the rope tying his loot cart to Antonio's motorcycle, and lit up.

[hr]
[i]Five minutes later...[/i]
[hr]

Antonio drove onwards through the city, his mind free of guilt. Behind him sat one end of Uriel. Several feet behind that was the [i]other[/i] end of Uriel, tied around the grille of a school bus packed with adults and children. Thanks to the astonishing durability of Antonio's tools, he could easily tow an entire schoolbus behind him without worrying about losing too much speed. Standing atop the bus's roof, Gene kept an eye out for any demons looking for a quick snack. 

Antonio and Gene's scholarly escort managed to make it out of the city almost entirely unscathed, safe for a few bruised shoulders and some scratched paint. As soon as it was safe enough to continue alone, one of the passengers took the bus's controls and drove off on the open road. Sitting together, bike and cart side by side, Gene and Antonio gave eachother a brisk high five.

"[color=goldenrod]So... want to go for another trip?[/color]" Asked Gene.
"I thought you'd never ask!" Said Antonio, smiling.
Back into the city they went, on a quest to save as many people as possible, in the only way they knew how. It was a hard job, but [i]somebody[/i] would have to do it.