[quote=@Stein][@Tojin]: Unfortunately I wasn’t able to accept your character. There were a few technical details missing and overall--while not bad--the Sheet seemed lacking. The abilities as well needed some further explanation, something that wasn’t even really mentioned in the Bio.

[@Nemaisare]: Accepted, tentatively but only because I was wondering if you’d be able to elaborate on why a normal person would potentially endanger a transplant heart fighting crime. I love the character, and I like the call to action via that type of tragedy, but it brings me pause because it’s a heart. Those aren’t cheap, and you’ve got pretty strict follow up procedures (I know for a number of years following the operation) if I’m not mistaken.

[@Natty]: Accepted- however, I’d like to see more in the area of a clearer image of the character, especially because he’s now inhabited by a prevalent demonic spirit. But I feel that can be shown in the IC.

[@Knighthawk]: Unfortunately, I’m not able to accept the character. There’s a spark for an interesting character, but I don’t feel you executed it like you could have. On top of that, the grammar mistakes worry for what might be to come ICly. 

[@FantasyChic]: Restricted Acceptance. The character is nice, but there’s a lot going on and you break the cardinal rule of giving us a Mary Sue-esque character. There’s good foundation laced in the sheet, but it’s overshadowed by frivolous information. I don’t think there should be so many “quirks” if they don’t play into the character. I don’t really know WHO the character is because of how she’s been rounded so-well, so my suggestion would be to go back through the character creation rules and brush up in some areas. Also in the bio, some cliche’s and contradictions to look at and I would recommend cutting some of the unnecessary information and focusing more on her motivation/call to action.

[@Heathen]: Accepted on the condition that you’ll clean up your motivation a bit. Skylar sounds a little too passive, though he is well thought out. I’d like to see a little bit more of an overt call to action even if that means tweaking a few things in the backstory.

[@Dirge]: There’s some technical details missing, but the character is wonderfully thought out and excites me with his potential. So the character is on probation until you go through the Character Creation rules and add/take out a couple of things.[/quote]