After what felt like hours of mindless wandering and people watching, Jane decided to try to find the group. Being alone with her thoughts and constantly checking for Rob’s reply to her text wasn’t doing any good. 

It took a few minutes, but she located the band leaving a tall rollercoaster that the sight of alone made Jane’s stomach flip. She immediately scurried over to to Austin and nudged his side. “Hey.”

"I was getting worried about you," Austin replied as he wrapped an arm around Jane's shoulders.

She rolled her eyes. "You know how much I hate amusement parks. Remember that time you and Rachel made me go back in the day?"

"Yeah," Austin nodded as he looked down at her, "but you still had [i]fun[/i]. You've been so quiet lately."

Jane sighed. "I know, I know. I'm sorry. Just got a lot going on right now," she pointed to her head. "I feel like I'm going fucking insane. Where's Rob?"

"Walked off about a half hour ago, figured he was going to find you." Austin smirked as he began walking slowly with his arm around her, following the group in front of them. "You need to fuck someone else."

Her eyes widened, and her head snapped up to look at him.

"Oh, don't act all polite [i]now[/i]. Look, you wanted things to be like the old days with Rob, right?"

Jane nodded in silence.

"Okay, well, how are you gonna manage that if all you want to do is jump on top of him every second of alone time you get, huh? When are you guys just going to hang out? Talk?"

She groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose between her fingers. "You're right," she mumbled.

"I miss my crazy, carefree, sex-addicted friend," Austin said with a snort. "Now, you're just a sad, nervous, sex-addicted friend."

"Fuck off," Jane laughed as she squeezed his torso. "Thanks, Aust."

"Anytime, J," he pressed a kiss into the top of her head and squeezed her back. “Go,” his voice boomed dramatically while he waved a hand. 

Jane stuck her tongue out at Austin, then waved to the rest of the group before grabbing her phone out of her bag and calling Andy. 

“Hello?” he asked, his voice giving away that he must had been asleep.

“Hey,” Jane replied quietly. “Sorry if I woke you up. Do you still wanna hang out?” 

“Sure thing. Not sure where the rest of the guys are, but I’m in the bus.” 
“Got it. Be there soon.” 

Jane then called a ride back to the lot where the busses were parked. She wasn’t sure how she felt at the moment, but that wasn’t news, seeing how each day brought more and more uncertainty. If this is what Rob really wanted – an open relationship – then she probably should give him the space that it included. Jane doubted he would ever openly ask for it, but she wasn’t stupid. She knew she was a lot to handle, physically and mentally, and it Rob wasn’t worn out yet, he probably would be soon. 

Jane arrived twenty minutes later to the lot and knocked on the door of the Vicarious bus to be greeted by shirtless Andy with a toothbrush hanging out of his mouth. His hand signaled for her to come in, and with a full mouth, he mumbled something about giving him a minute. 

She nodded and sat down on the couch, similar to theirs, in the ‘living room’ area of the bus. Andy’s guitar was leaning against the small coffee table, and atop it, a journal with scribbles covering the lined pages and a pen. Part of her wanted to lean in and read the words, but she knew how sacred an unfinished song could be, so instead, she leaned back to make herself comfortable as she waited for Andy to return. 

After a minute or so, he returned, still in only a pair of jeans, and he sat down next to her on the couch, each of them facing each other and leaning against its arms. “What’s new, babe?” he asked as he worked to clean up the table.

Jane rested her head on a fist. “Same shit, different continent,” she laughed. “New song?” 

He looked up and smiled. “The start of one. It needs some work.” 

“Can I hear it?” Jane asked excitedly. 

Andy paused for a minute, unsure if he should play an unfished song to her, but he nodded. “Of course.” He grabbed the guitar and opened the notebook once again and cleared his throat before beginning to strum the chords out gently. 

Jane’s eyes closed as he began to sing, enjoying its deep tone and richness. It was the first time she was able to hear him without amplified guitars, bass, and drums accompanying him, and to say she was impressed would be an understatement. The way he performed it was dripping in a sense of quiet confidence, and Jane found herself almost disappointed when he stopped.

“That’s all I got for now,” he spoke as he cleared his throat, placing the guitar back in its spot against the table.

Jane opened her eyes and smiled. “I liked it. A lot.”

He sheepishly returned the smile. “Thanks. If you’re down, you can help me finish it sometime.” After wiggling his body a bit, he was facing Jane once again. 

“I’m definitely down,” she nodded. “So how’ve things been with the band?”

Andy sighed. “It’s been alright. We’re all doing our own thing. Zoe and I have been butting heads lately.” 

“That sucks,” Jane replied as she dug through her purse for a joint, and once she found it, she lit it carefully and exhaled a cloud above them. “Why are you guys fighting?”

“Stupid shit,” Andy shook his head as he took the joint from her fingers. “The band. Opinions on meaningless topics. Little annoyances. I don’t know how we ever tried to make things work between us.” He took another hit and passed it back to Jane. “How are you and Rob?”

Jane squeezed her eyes shut. “I don’t know. I don’t wanna talk about it anymore. You’ve listened to enough of my bullshit.”

“True,” Andy joked, a smirk on his face. “Well then, Ms. Molloy. What [i]would[/i] you like to do then?”  

Her eyes lingered on his on a moment as she blew out the smoke. Her mind was racing of all the things that could come out of making a move, and it made her pause in silence for a moment. There could be loads of backlash from this, not only with Rob, but maybe even Zoe. The two bands. Andy himself.

But, in the end, Jane’s desires always took over any willpower she attempted to have. It always did. She came to the conclusion that it was pointless to try to fight her urges, whether it be drugs, booze, or another person.

Jane moved towards him slowly on the couch, his widening eyes causing her to smile. Once close enough, she leaned in and kissed him, moving her small hand behind his head. After a few minutes, she pulled away and looked at him only a few inches away from his face.

“Jane,” he whispered, “are you sure you’re ready for this?” He moved a strand of blonde hair away from her face and gazed up at her.

Instead of replying verbally, Jane leaned back in and kissed him again, this time with much more force than before, as if to get her message across. And it did. 

[center]*****[/center]

It was around 5:00 pm when Jane finally exited the other band’s bus and headed for her own. After noticing no sign of life inside the bus besides their sleeping driver, Jane made her way to the back of the bus and hopped into the shower.

She had nothing to complain about in the physical realm regarding the time she had just spent with Andy.  It was satisfying and fun. But emotionally, Jane felt a void that she didn’t experience after being intimate with Rob. She knew it was because she had no romantic feelings for Andy, which was completely okay, but it felt weird to sleep with someone without the intense passion behind it. The meaningless sex that Jane once loved now left her with a weird feeling in her stomach. 

But now, if she started finding other ways take care of her needs, maybe she wouldn’t jump Rob’s bones every chance he got. If Jane had be honest, imagining her and Rob hanging out without sex didn’t sound [i]awful.[/i] Although she’d never admit it, it would be nice to just be held by him. To talk about bullshit. To lay on his chest. Not to mention, she absolutely loved it when Rob was the one that came on to her for a change, but she knew that she never really gave him the chance. Not anymore, though. Jane was going to really try to respect the space that he probably craved.

She exited the shower and quickly got dressed in one of Rob’s t shirts, which landed mid-thigh, and a pair of boy shorts, and after a moment of debate, she crawled into his lower bunk and closed the curtain. Maybe he’d want to nap before their set at ten. 

In the silence of the bus, guilt began to creep into the back of Jane’s mind, but she kept fighting the thoughts with the argument that Rob was the one who had asked for this in the first place. That Rob was the one hanging out with Zoe. He couldn’t blame her for sleeping with someone else, could he? Especially when it would probably lessen the tension rising between them.

Jane groaned as she pulled the blanket up over her shoulders, and after a few minutes of more internal dialogue, she checked her phone once again to see if Rob had ever texted her back. Nothing. And after a few minutes of trying not to over analyze the situation, she drifted off in his bunk.