[quote=@hayley]
[hider=Incoherant rambling]Foreword: I'm kind of a dog person. My mother's father's side all are, it's just a family thing. If you're not a dog person you probably won't get my whinging so whatever.
My mother's side of the family is 1000% f***ed up (which is really a separate issue. I could fill pages with it). Anyway, my granddad moved away last year, but just before that his dog (my favourite) died while I was at uni. She died over a year ago and I only found out because I was having lunch with my grandma yesterday who found out through someone else (they're separated) that one of his dogs had died but she didn't know (or care) which...I had to ask my brother through facebook messenger... It wasn't a fun way to find out that to all intents and purposes a member of your family has died. I don't know if I've been half-disowned because I'm my mother's daughter, or whether there's an object permanence issue where they just forget I exist when I'm not around, I send birthday/Christmas cards but they're never returned, wrote letters that were never replied to, even though they're far away I'm trying to get it through that I care about them... I'm just so hurt that NOBODY bothered to tell me, even though they got in contact with my brother about it, when everyone knew how much I f***ing loved that dog.
Later my grandma said something very...not right about someone in our family who died before that happened and I just...I don't know at what point duty to my family becomes masochism. I tend to be a bit "f*** family" but I don't really believe that, I just don't believe in being loyal to anyone that repeatedly and deliberately hurts you (which some families do when they take one another for granted). I can't help but care about these people but all it does is cause me more bloody pain. I don't get anything out of it except trauma. I can't feel selfish when all I really want is them to drop me a text once or twice a year or maybe send a Christmas card or whatever. 

I guess I'm just going to keep surrounding myself with the awesome people and family who do want to be part of my life and aren't so meh. [/hider]

e: also I just got home and realised I forgot my toothbrush. F*** MY LIFE
[/quote]
Oh my god, that sucks I'm so sorry. Dogs ARE family members and I HATE dealing with people who treat them like trash that's thrown away if they pass on. That pisses me the fuck off, pardon my language.