[img]http://i.imgur.com/dzcuboo.png[/img]

Welcome back to the Fourth of July Hunger Games! Last time we saw our first deaths. Hemingway shot Uncle Same acoustically, and Florida Man began a career of doing exactly the sort of thing we all hoped he would do. Tensions are running high probably, so let's get down to business. On to Day 1!

[img]http://i.imgur.com/lD6yXth.png[/img]

Well we start out the first day exactly perfectly. The "Trump is a Pro-Clinton agent" conspiracy proves itself irrefutably true. We see people prepare for the games. Forest keeps moving, Kebab and Snowden show solidarity, and Obama downs a cold one before getting to business. The WBC remembers the Alamo and likely debates it's pertinence to homosexuality in modern America (Travis/Crockett OTP). Nic Cage acts out a scene in his next movie "National Treasure Saint Louis: Hunt for a Way Out of This Fucked City." Abe is a better baller than Kissinger, which isn't surprising really. And that conversation between Guy and a redneck is probably a scenario that has played out in real life more than once. 

[img]http://i.imgur.com/iVMtU0d.png[/img]

The Democrats are winning the hunger games electoral votes. Two inspiring stories are formed. But death stalks our early game. Washington, the father of our country, dies tragically trying to explore it. peperony and chease.

Jackie Kennedy does the other thing. Is she tired of the US? Afraid? Or is she looking to find another greek guy and knows they mostly grow in Greece? Either way, she fails to make it. peperony and chease. 

Our basketball heroes receive gifts. But Brobyburger denies your propertarian gifts and the capitalist swine who sold them to you. Solidarity, broby. Solidarity. 

[img]http://i.imgur.com/6kuCZhM.png[/img]

Jackson attempts to change the Democratic sway of the hunger games electorate by voting Republican. For those who don't know, this is especially juicy because Andrew Jackson founded the Democratic party. Harriet Tubman puts MLK on her insurance while Betty White and Roosevelt form a union. Is Broby's communism starting to catch? Michael Bay watches fireworks and scoffs, knowing he could do better with a heaping scoop of CGI. 

[img]http://i.imgur.com/qxyKG5y.png[/img]

Our first deaths. Washington and Uncle Sam dying so early seems like an omen. I think they were brothers too. At least, one is the father and the other an uncle. Or is Uncle Sam actually Washington's brother in law? If so, who was our mother? That secret goes with these men to their grave. 

Anyway, keep in touch until next time when i post some more stuff.