[quote=@Evil Snowman] Okay I'm sorry I'm a bit behind the time I said I'd be done. But the backstory proved to be a real pain. So I been able to put backstory together I can tolerate, although not super happy with. Anyway I hope what I put together is at least passable. Also there might be a few errors rushed the editing part [hider=Character] [center][img]http://cdn.awwni.me/otkb.png[/img][/center] [color=YellowGreen][center][h2] Valeriya "Val" Raskova[/h2][/center][/color][center][img]http://66.media.tumblr.com/51fc61ac770a524e9468f174afa94d7f/tumblr_inline_n1xc79Kcic1rb3m8r.png[/img] [color=YellowGreen][i]"So long as my life is simple and I can be pilot I'm happy.[/i][/color][/center] [color=YellowGreen][sub][ ⛨ ] C A L L S I G N[/sub][/color][hr][indent][color=7e6e75] Titian [/color][/indent] [color=YellowGreen][sub][ ⛨ ] N C O R I G I N[/sub][/color][hr][indent][color=7e6e75] Volkov [/color] [/indent] [color=YellowGreen][sub][ ⛨ ] D - O - B[/sub][/color][hr][indent][color=7e6e75]May 27th, 2644 (33) [/color][/indent] [color=YellowGreen][sub][ ⛨ ] G E N D E R[/sub][/color][hr][indent][color=7e6e75]Female [/color][/indent] [color=YellowGreen][sub][ ⛨ ] A P P E A R A N C E[/sub][/color][hr][indent][color=7e6e75] Tried be would the first word many would use to describe Valeriya. The girl always looking like she could fall asleep at moment. Even when she had a good full nights rest, it simply being her natural look. A small lazy grin semi permanently glued to her face. Fading only when her mood shifts into a more negative one. Growing when her mood is in more positive. Psychically, Valeriya is quite short standing around 5 foot 5 inches and is of a lean build. With a set of jade green eyes naturally, however wheres cosmetic contacts to make them red. Valeriya's clothing tends to be whatever she can get a hold of that fits. Leading to some odd mismatched combinations of pants, dresses, tank top, and shirts. With colours that sometimes clash honorably and or going a single monotone. Not caring how silly she may look going for being comfortable over everything else. Dressing to best match the weather and whatever she is doing. At times or if the a situation demands it Valeriya seems to take some care in her appearance, wearing some sort of carefully planned outfit. The only thing Valeriya makes some sort of effort with is her jet black hair which is kept either in a bun or pony tail. Favoring the bun during the day or when piloting her NC and pony tail at night or when ever she got free time. She lets it flow freely every one and a while showing it to be shoulder length. [/color][/indent] [color=YellowGreen][sub][ ⛨ ] P E R S O N A L I T Y[/sub][/color][hr][indent][color=7e6e75] At first glance Valeriya tends to come across as quite and borderline antisocial. Happier to merely watch those around her go about their day. This is however only a half truth, as Valeriya does enjoy human interaction but she finds it difficult. Having trouble gauging how people are feeling or thinking. Unless it's painfully obvious. Although most of the time Valeriya wont really care. Having never really cared what others thought of her. Merely acting the way she dose simply because it is her. Her actions guided by her own morals, loyalties and honor code that she adheres herself to. Not that she willing to share what that honor code is exactly. Valeriya being quite a tight lipped woman when it comes certain things about herself, when she simply wants to be or order to be. Valeriya at her core is a caring laid back person, who seems to always be slightly happy when left to her own devices. She of person who likes to keep her the things in her life as simple as humanly possible, for a long a possible. Valeriya is the type that likes to do things at her own pace, hating it when she feels pressured to do things quickly. Although makes a exception when she is piloting her NC or around a superior. Understanding that it merely part of the life she chose. Outside of that it is one of the easiest ways to sour the woman mood a task that is not easy given her laid back nature. At times she almost seems to look down and regretful but refuses to talk about it. Once inside her NC or as needed Valeriya show's an attitude befitting a solider who seems to enjoy her line of work ... most [/color][/indent] [color=YellowGreen][sub][ ⛨ ] S K I L L S E T[/sub][/color][hr][indent][color=7e6e75]A brief synopsis of your out-of-mech skills and talents through descriptive text. Drawing and sketches: Valeriya is skilled at drawing and sketching something she has been doing since she was a teenager. Soldiers Instincts: Having been a pilot since 18 and seen battle serval times. Valeriya has developed a fairly good sense of danger. Often allowing a second or two to either ready herself for a fight or flee. [/color][/indent] [color=YellowGreen][sub][ ⛨ ] B A C K S T O R Y[/sub][/color][hr][indent][color=7e6e75] Valeriya was born in the heart of Volkov's mega-city. To a pair of NC pilots, who both worked for Volkov. Growing up Valeriya was mostly raised by one of her uncles and her aunt. Her parents retuning to work as pilots when Valeriya turned 3. In order to provide the best they could for their daughter. As a child and teenager Valeriya didn't understand this. Leading to her to dislike her parents, but for as much as she grew to dislike them she grew to admire the NCs the piloted. One of the few memories that Valeriya considered positive is hear her parents talk about their mech and the things they did in them. These stories sparking an interest in becoming a pilot herself, young Valeriya often picturing self piloting an NC. This interest stuck with Valeriya thought her schooling, although faded slightly as other interests came into her life. It always stayed close to her. Even as she reached 16 birthday she still lost herself in her mind picturing herself as pilot going missions. Pretending to by the NCs she was "piloting" acting out it's actions. This marking her as the weird one in her small circle of friends. However Valeriya didn't overly mind. As she finished school and question was asked what did she want to do when she left school. Giving the thought of becoming a pilot. Deciding to ask her parents when she saw them next. The question thought not sitting well with her parents who both objected to the idea. This only made Valeriya want to become a pilot more, who left home to live with the uncle that raised her. Valeriya quickly growing to resent her parents refusing to to speaking or having anything to do with them. Undergoing the surgery to have a Neural Plug installed, Valeriya began to the road to recovery and learning how to use an NC and the start of a career as a pilot with Volkov. She was posted to a small "independent" settlement that was under Volkov protection. The company having a good in it as it was along a supply major route to a couple of other Volkov facilities in the area. It also helped in keeping the local raider groups under some sort of control able to deploy units quickly to deal with them if they started to become problematic. Valeriya stayed at this posting until she was 32. Making the settlement her home. A home she would leave during an operation to recover a lost transport. Valeriya knew to any the company didn't really care about the people in the settlement. Interested in the settlement only because it had benefit in being there. However Valeriya was always able to look the other way. However after the recovery of the lost transport an operation that turned into an utter mess. Valeriya deciding to go AWOL unwilling to continued to work for Volkov. Maybe due to the companies lack of care or what happened during that operation she was listed as KIA. After several months she somehow managed to get work with a small independent trade company, that didn't ask why she was listed as dead. Merely giving her a new ID. After a year working for the trade company mostly guarding it's conveys, Valeriya ended up in New Anchorage. While she waited for the convoy to unload and trade off all it's goods she got time to tour the city. Liking what she saw and the fact she was looking for somewhere more permanent to live. Valeriya decided to make a go for it hearing New Anchorage was long for NC pilots. [/color][/indent] [color=YellowGreen][sub][ ⛨ ] T H E M E C H[/sub][/color][hr][indent][color=7e6e75] [hider=Reference Pic] [img]https://images5.alphacoders.com/308/308400.jpg[/img] [/hider] A large mech design used by Volkov, designed around two core idea's. 1. A mech that could take a beating. 2. A mech that could bring even heavier fire power to the battlefield, compared to a "standard" NC. Thus Titans design came to light a mech protected by thick armour plating. With enough strength to haul large NC's weapons into battle. All this armor alongside the presence of a heavy weapon and it other armaments. Leaves Titan heavier and slower then most, requiring more power to haul it weight across the battlefield Titan is painted gun metal gray with the Volkov logos on the mech have been crudely painted over with blue paint. Its armor currently covered in nicks and dents. [hider=Current Armaments] [u]HHINPC1 Nova Plasma Cannon Mk1:[/u] A large plasma cannon designed to fire small blots of plasma at mid-long range at relatively high rate of fire. The weapon able to fire continually for about minute before requiring a moment to cool down. The weapon operating at beast when fired in short bursts The weapon is also able to charge more powerful shot at the cost of extra energy consumption and over heating the weapon. Due to the the Nova power requirements in combat it is powered by an armored back mounted plasma reactor. Located on the upper section the is attached to the upper section of a mech back. This reactor connected to the cannon by a belt, which then store power in several cells granting several seconds of fire or a half charged shot should the reactor be offline for whatever reason. At close range the weapon becomes more of hindrance. It size making aiming difficult at all but slow targets. In melee the weapon only really use is that is can be used to club thing however the effectiveness of such a tactic is questionable. [u] Missile Pods X2:[/u] Your basic run of the mil shoulder mounted missile pods armed mid ranged heat seeking missiles with 12 missiles per pod. The missiles can be fired in 4 round bursts. (2 missiles per pod) [u]Shiv Sub Machinegun:[/u] A small sub machinegun stored in the left arm under the armour. Only deploying when the weapon is activated. Only effective on lightly armored targets and is only effective at short range. The guns magazine holds 120 rounds per magazine and is reload via a mechanical system into the arm, the gun having a three round burst mode or fully automatic. Titan carries 1 extra clip [/hider] [/color][/indent] [color=YellowGreen][sub][ ⛨ ] R E L A T I O N S[/sub][/color][hr][indent][color=7e6e75]None for now[/color][/indent] [/hider] [/quote] [INDENT]Review time! Outside of a few typos (tried instead of tired, for example), I think this is off to a great start. Though I do advise proofreading it and fixing the spelling/grammar when you have time. But I’ll get to the thick of the important questions I have rather than nitpick it if I get the basic gist of it down. So let’s get started.[/INDENT] [quote](33)[/quote] [INDENT]Why 33? That’s quite the amount of experience by age alone and I’m trying to figure out what bearing this particularly has at the moment. [/INDENT] [quote]Valeriya was born in the heart of Volkov's mega-city.[/quote] [INDENT]Which one? Moscow? St. Petersburg? Novosibirsk? Yekaterinburg? Volgograd? [/INDENT] [quote]As she finished school and question was asked what did she want to do when she left school. Giving the thought of becoming a pilot. Deciding to ask her parents when she saw them next. The question thought not sitting well with her parents who both objected to the idea. This only made Valeriya want to become a pilot more, who left home to live with the uncle that raised her. Valeriya quickly growing to resent her parents refusing to to speaking or having anything to do with them. Undergoing the surgery to have a Neural Plug installed, Valeriya began to the road to recovery and learning how to use an NC and the start of a career as a pilot with Volkov.[/quote] [INDENT]Volkov is definitely a bit more… extreme of the Major Corporations, but that comes with being the most “efficient”. Generally those in the megacity are tested to see if they have NC compatibility when they are very young and due to testing for positive/negative being basically harmless it really comes at no cost to anyone and is included in childhood physical exams. For example, Stein was tested when she was around nine years old and her father effectively sold her to the corporation as a soldier to gain more favor. Being pilots I am quite intrigued that they didn’t do likewise but I suppose they might’ve wanted a better life for their daughter considering the serious physical and psychological side effects that come from piloting a NC thus opting instead for other educational choices. But with that in mind, her parents probably wouldn’t want to put the credits over to pay for the surgery and kept making decisions for her until she was an adult. Though I think Volkov recruiters would definitely try their hardest to buy their loyalty and in turn their daughter. I wonder what kind of reputations I could give them as a GM…. Hm….[/INDENT] [quote]However after the recovery of the lost transport an operation that turned into an utter mess. Valeriya deciding to go AWOL unwilling to continued to work for Volkov. Maybe due to the companies lack of care or what happened during that operation she was listed as KIA. [/quote] [INDENT]KIA would imply she was believed to die in battle (in suit?) which I find unlikely that Volkov would make presumptions as while you are in “pilot mode” your life signs among other things are linked with the neural computer. Volkov would be able to see if you were alive or dead unless your NC totally got destroyed which would have a lot of bad side effects presuming your core survived it alongside you as well. I’d suggest reworking this and trying to find something that could work elsewise, unfortunately. AWOL is fine, KIA probably not.[/INDENT]