Ezra had stayed on the couch during the fight outside. He could hear Marta yelling at Jeremiah and it made him flinch a bit. She had no idea what was going on and she refused to be open with him about it. She should be yelling at him, not his leader. He watched as the others went outside making brief eye contact with Isiah who looked more confused and lost than anything else. He was holding Atalia’s hand and it made Ezra slightly angry. They could be ass affectionate as they wanted and it wasn’t frowned upon. He grasped the chain hanging from his neck for comfort since Marta’s warmth was longer with him.

Isiah had taken it upon himself to go after Marta leaving Atalia at the front door with a frown, but she ushered him to give chase. He was the only one who could tell her the truth, he had to let her know what was happening and how he was trying to stop it. He waited a moment outside of the shed for her too cool down and when he finally heard it become quiet inside he stepped in and closed the door behind him. He saw her shoulders shaking up and down and his heart began to ache for her.

“Marta...I won’t let you lose him. The men...their all blood thirsty to get revenge on the people who have wronged them, but nobody takes the lead in the way Ezra does. He is fighting a battle on both sides. One is to protect his people, his Jewish brothers and sisters, and the other is for you. He has more to lose and the most to gain in this fight. He is their icon, while also being someone they dislike. They don’t approve of you two, so he has to prove himself more. To show that he has not turned his back on us in the name of love. He is blood thirsty these days. Just yesterday before we began our drive he put three of our best soldiers….three of our best men into the infirmary. They are in critical condition just by him alone. I have tried to ease him back and he tells me of his fears and he cries to me Marta, but after losing his mom...he needs more than just me to bring him back to who he really is. You are his guiding voice...I cannot bring him any further. I was  hoping this trip...seeing you and being around you would open his heart once again, but if it is too much for you I understand. I won’t burden you with it...but I think if he spends the day with you...with me and Atalia that he will open enough,” Isiah said sitting down next to her and wrapping an arm around her shoulders. He knew he was asking her for a lot, but at this moment he couldn’t keep it to himself anymore. 

Jeremiah walked into the living room to check on Ezra who was sitting there emotionless. The man walked over to the boy and shook him roughly. “You give her what she wants, but not too much Ezra. You can pretend you’re feeling without really doing it,” he said sharply.

Ezra flinched a bit at his words, “I...I’m trying Jeremiah. Seeing her...it makes me want to cave and it makes me want her love and I know I shouldn’t because then I won’t be able to protect her,” he said clenching his jaw.

“You are acting weak. You are not the man who put Harrod, Joshua, or Elijah in the infirmary last night. You are pathetic. If you do not get yourself together then you will only be the downfall of our team,” Jeremiah said slapping him in the face.

Ezra kept his eyes to the ground as he heard a gasp escape Atalia’s mouth. “I will not falter and I will not fail, sir. I will remain emotionally detached from her. I will only give her enough to appease her desires and I will make sure it is not genuine. I will lead our fight to Hitler and I will take his life one day for the good of our people and for her,” he said as a tear fell down his cheek. He glanced at Atalia who refused to make eye contact with him.

He was no longer the Ezra anybody knew, and the fight to be this brand new person was eating away at him. He didn’t want to be this cold or this harsh, but it was what everyone kept telling him he needed to be. His feelings made him weak and that meant Marta had the power to either destroy his resolve or to fuel it.