"Blagh" Jason grimaced "I hate Chinese food" he complained. "Why do we even need that crap? We've still got pizza. Shouldn't that be good enough?" he said. "My uncle told about how all the Chinese food places are working with the Chinese government to overthrow America from the inside...then again, he was seriously baked at the time..."

"Y-your uncle does drugs!?" Tommy blurted out in surprise

"Well he didn't know they were meth brownies. In fact, none of us found out until a few days later. Turns out he accidentally interfered with a drug smuggling operation. He didn't get arrested because as it turns out, it's not against the law to do illegal drugs if you don't know they're drugs. Boy, that was a funny family reunion"