[@The Grey Dust]First let me say that I’ve seen this character before. I think in a tournament in the past that I’ve participated in on another site. So, I know he’s a premade that you’re trying to [i]shove[/i] into this game.

As I was reading this CS, I had to wonder who were you writing this for? Obviously it was for yourself, but you were basically writing a story that 100% revolved around your character and everyone else just did not matter. This isn’t about the four gods or the four grandmasters, this story is about Wu Dan who is trying to be the Avatar. This isn’t Avatar: The Last Airbender. The Dark Chi in this game IS evil and it is like a slow disease waiting to inevitably take the soul of anyone who uses it, if that person didn’t give their soul to demons already just to acquire the power.

You didn’t even explain how he was 300+ years old, living outside human morality. I like that you got him involved on my character’s current story at the end, but this CS is just too Mary Sue. I don’t know why on earth you thought I would accept a CS like this. This CS basically was, “Hey, this is a cool idea, but I got a better one. Let’s make this entire game about me.”

Again, I have no idea why: 1) you wrote this much, and 2) you thought I would accept this CS when you were done. You should have just told me that you were going to submit a Mary Sue to me and I would have saved you the trouble because I would have said, “No man that’s not a good idea because I’m just going to reject that shit.”

It was a good story, but I’m not accepting this CS. Sorry. It goes against everything I believe in.