[img]http://i.imgur.com/B5zECf8.png?1[/img] The sun rises on another day of advent as people take candies from blood-soaked calendars. Aaron, Turboman, and the Furby have perished in the night, the later at the hands of the twice-murdering Ash, who is running maniac through the arena just a'killin like the rules of the game prescribe. [img]http://i.imgur.com/RdhhUxn.png[/img] And right there at the beginning, An Elf kills the gnome child in a robbery gone wrong, stealing his stocking stuffers and giving them to the Emoticone. Santa's workshop, it seems, requires Grand Theft Gift to operate. The Grinch understood all along. Peace on earth, goodwill to Bert. Last person to have goodwill bestowed on them by the games was Cynder, who promptly harnessed that good will for the purpose of murder. Dr. Light might be a Fairy Tale, or he might be real and made of snow. This is interesting because earlier Dr Light responded to rumors that Rudolph of red-nose fame is a fairytale by also claiming that character to be, in fact, real and made of snow. We're getting into some deep and complicated Westworld type shit here that is making my head hurt so we are moving on now... The Grinch, having the true spirit of Christmas (theft) as presented by the elf, uses this power to destroy a child. A prodigious child this is true, but a child all the same, who is dead, by the spirit of Christmas. Bing Crosby, being of the Greatest Generation, puts up with none of this Alt-Right shit, and he kills the fuck out of the Nazi that killed Aaron. This is interesting because he does so using fruit cake, and he was seen earlier sharpening a fruitcake. So he didn't blunt-trauma that Nazi, no no no, he turned him into a candied pin cushion. Travolta receives a high school band. Jesus, knowing that Chanukah Zombie is a sneaky Jew disguised as Santa, slaughters him with snow. John McClane attempts to fight communism, but is too weak and has to flee. Ursula also gains a band. Meanwhile, Dexter takes up the Zombie's call and dresses as a fake santa, thus returning us to the magical "Fake/Real" Santa ratio of 2/1. [img]http://i.imgur.com/G39Qqm7.png[/img] Clirkus, AKA the Reason for the Season, chases Cynder, AKA The Goodwill Baker, across a lake. Bowser kills Krampus, incidentally one of the fake Santas, and puts his head on a tree as an offering to either Baby Jesus or the real Santa. This brings us to a Santa ration of 1/1. The Wicked Witch begs for a being made of frozen water to kill her, but Frosty is horrified by the notion of using his body in such a way. A Waifu hunts for nuts, and Saturn for a drink. Mr Potato Head freezes to death, or at least becomes a Mr Ore-Ida Head. Burma helps me make a pie crust, which is good because, in real life, I made a pie crust a few weeks back for the first time in my life and everyone told me it tasted sort of like bacon, so I need the help. The Witch Cat hears Putin wrapped in a blanket talking to it about the traffic. Charlie Brown receives lactating young women. Santa leads a raiding party of Ernie, Broby, and Woody Guthrie to relieve the Elvenqueen of her chestnuts, leaving her nutless. Clint receives drummers while Rudolph receives some girls. Chunk and Sloth, still oblivious, having failed to steal a Pumpkin Spice Latte from a fake girl and then retreated from the snow, happily roast chestnuts unaware of the carnage beyond. Ash finds a perfect Christmas Tree, and considering his predilection for blood, I expect a perfect Christmas Tree for him is probably the one with Krampus's severed head hanging in it. Papa Smurf finds Egg-nog. In two days that is literally all he has done; find egg nog, then find more egg nog. [img]http://i.imgur.com/llb6jX3.png[/img] There they go, the second wave of honored dead. Remember those names, because they are all losers.