[@Dervish][hider=Critique response! WOO!]
First off, Thenx Dervs <3 
I'll edit accordingly and add some more clarification on what is needed. However, I think you kind of overlooked that he is a spellsword first and foremost, and the reason his magic is above his thieving is because he uses it to enhance his sword skills, which he uses quite a bit. I didn't think it was prudent to say "and when he fought in his ship battles, oh man did he use magic." Since he grew up with it, it wasn't worth much mentioning again. So unless you feel strongly against it, I'll keep my magic stuff where it is (though I took away the destruction and restoration). 
Also, I'll need some clarification on a few things for me to edit. Some of your critique is on your taste in substance. I'll switch my story around as much as I can since you da GM (like I'll take away the Knights and probably do the necromancy book where its his name penned in it. Good idea btw), but when it comes to something like, say, why did he think his father didn't love him when his father probably did. Isn't that how many bastards feel? Or couldn't there have been times where his father might have been cold to him but listing "that one tuesday" in my history seems kinda odd. Or for him not leaving Skaven so soon, wouldn't he be thinking that he'd likely be pursued outside the city so he decided to wait it out a bit? (I think I answered my last question for me so I'll edit that in lol). 
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