Here is my updated/completed character sheet for Marina Brimlad (changed the last name). I think I'm ready for critique and comments! [hider=Marina Brimlad] [color=CCCCCC][center][color=DodgerBlue][h2][u] M A R I N A B R I M L A D [/u][/h2][/color] [img]http://thumbnail.egloos.net/600x0/http://pds20.egloos.com/pds/201102/01/47/e0028947_4d47a487e21f0.jpg[/img] [hider=Bonus RWBY Chibi version!][img]http://img.amiami.jp/images/product/main/112//FIG-MOE-2641.jpg[/img][/hider] [/center] [indent][indent][color=DodgerBlue][sub][u] Ｇ Ｅ Ｎ Ｄ Ｅ Ｒ [/u][/sub][/color] [indent][indent]Female[/indent][/indent] [color=DodgerBlue][sub][u] Ａ Ｇ Ｅ [/u][/sub][/color] [indent][indent]17[/indent][/indent] [color=DodgerBlue][sub][u] Ｒ Ａ Ｃ Ｅ [/u][/sub][/color] [indent][indent]Human[/indent][/indent] [color=DodgerBlue][sub][u] Ａ Ｃ Ａ Ｄ Ｅ Ｍ Ｙ Ｏ Ｆ Ｏ Ｒ Ｉ Ｇ Ｉ Ｎ [/u][/sub][/color] [indent][indent]Atlas Academy of Mantle[/indent][/indent] [color=DodgerBlue][sub][u] Ａ Ｐ Ｐ Ｅ Ａ Ｒ Ａ Ｎ Ｃ Ｅ & Ｐ Ｅ Ｒ Ｓ Ｏ Ｎ Ａ Ｌ Ｉ Ｔ Ｙ [/u][/sub][/color] [indent][indent]Marina is a blue-eyed young woman of Mantle military nobility, which informs her posture and gestures to an extent that she doesn't even realize. She is not particularly tall, she's self-conscious about her stocky figure and slightly wide face, and she has her long blue hair tied in a somewhat loose ponytail that is ready to fly apart at any given moment save for the red hair ribbon she wears - yet she stands straight in her neat and proper clothes and holds her chin up high, exuding a sense of confidence in her abilities that commands respect. Her Aura is a solid blue. For battle, she usually wears a charcoal-colored military-style uniform with puffy upper arm sleeves that become more form-fitting around the forearms, loose pants around the thighs, knee-high black leather miltary boots, black gloves, and a black belt. Over this, she is usually equipped with a blue metal breastplate with two red stripes down the sides outlined in thin strips of white, has a blue metal vambrace and pauldron on her left arm as well as some additional armor plates on her left glove, and an extra plate of armor that extends from her cuirass on her left hip down to her thigh on her left side. She wears a pair of ammo bandoliers around her belt area with extra grenades for her weapon. She strives to keep this uniform as clean and as neat as possible (like all of her clothes), given the style of some of its features. Outside of battle, she will dress accordingly as she sees the demands of the situation. Formal occasions are her [i]forte[/i], and even in more casual situations, she will be dressed crisply. Marina prefers her battle attire since it covers her entire body and hides some of the stockiness of her frame, but she will not shy away from what she sees as her duty to be seen by the public as a member of her noble household. Marina is a curious mix - she respects and honors the traditions that made Mantle such a strong military power, yet she also is glad she lives in a time where she can express herself more freely than ever before. She feels [i]noblesse oblige[/i] as her primary motivator in becoming a cadet at the Atlas Academy, and wants to prove to everyone that Mantle will be excellent at any task they choose - including this new business of training Huntsmen and Huntresses. That said, she also has some of the prejudices inherited from her father about the proper place of the lower classes - particularly those of different nations, and of the Faunus.[/indent][/indent] [color=DodgerBlue][sub][u] Ｌ Ｉ Ｆ Ｅ & Ｍ Ｏ Ｔ Ｉ Ｖ Ａ Ｔ Ｉ Ｏ Ｎ Ｓ [/u][/sub][/color] [indent][indent]Marina is the daughter of a naval officer father and a skilled diplomat mother. Her mother has long had sympathies for the ideals of self-expression and color, and was delighted to be a part of the process of coming up with a treaty that would forever allow this to be the rule of all the kingdoms. Marina was suddenly given a freedom she had never experienced before in her childhood, and she found she enjoyed it. Yet, her father remained bitter that Mantle lost the war, and his strong sentiment that things would have been better if the traditions of Mantle had become the rule of law have not been lost on Marina. Certainly, some of Mantle's standards as a whole were not admirable, but there was still a sense of nobility and honor in those traditions that Marina saw as still necessary in the current world. Marina grew up around the military, and even before the advent of the Academies, it was expected that she would become an excellent officer and leader someday. She would often sail with her father and learn how to run a boat, and she often stepped up to the task of taking command in her father's absence on her family's boat. Once the idea of the Academies came into reality, Marina volunteered immediately, though her age prevented her from joining Atlas Academy at the very first. Nevertheless, her experience around the military gave her a head start among many of the other nobles who hadn't had such an advantage, being the children of noblemen and dilettantes, so she quickly rose to prominence as an honorable yet fierce combatant on the training field. Her parents still quarrel about the way the war should have gone, and Marina desperately wants to prove that they both can be right. And so she would leap at the opportunity to make sure a representative of Atlas joined the other cadets on the mission to Vytal.[/indent][/indent] [color=DodgerBlue][sub][u] Ｗ Ｅ Ａ Ｐ Ｏ Ｎ Ｓ & Ｓ Ｋ Ｉ Ｌ Ｌ Ｓ [/u][/sub][/color] [indent][indent][color=DodgerBlue]❖ Bedlam Flourish[/color] [img]http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-hxhtBOHPBWY/T07AmChavTI/AAAAAAAAAGI/vahGgWW2dQg/s1600/VAR+PRINT.jpeg[/img] [indent]Bedlam Flourish is a combination of a grenade launcher and an enormous two-handed single-edged sword, colored mostly blue and metallic gray with some simple white block and line markings. When being used in launcher mode, it is held by two smaller handles, one near the rear of the launcher with a trigger and one in the middle to balance it while in use; the weapon also deploys two round ammo drums when used in this mode. As a sword, there is a larger handle that allows a two-handed grip underneath the trigger handle, with a curved finger guard extending out below that. When in sheathed form, the blade pulls into the grenade launcher assembly along with the ammo drums, which then shortens itself by approximately one-half to fit on Marina's back. The grenade launcher uses Dust shells which explode with whatever element they are loaded with, and has a mode that lets her detonate the grenade before launching, causing a blast of that element to come directly out of the barrel in a cone-shaped short-range burst. This latter feature is what gives her some extra mobility and her landing strategy, as she can use the burst mode to propel her in a given direction or to slow her fall down, though she can also use it offensively by stabbing the sword forward and then initiating burst mode.[/indent] [color=DodgerBlue]❖ Shipshape[/color] [indent]Marina is familiar with the proper running and maintenance of boats and ships, having grown up around water and having a father as a naval officer. She knows the terminology, protocol and knots, and she has even captained her family's boat on a few occasions. She is just as comfortable on a boat as she is on land. She is also an excellent swimmer, though she is a little shy of being seen in swimming attire.[/indent] [color=DodgerBlue]❖ Noble-Born[/color] [indent]Having been born into a noble family with strong traditions and social obligations, Marina has grown up being taught about etiquette, honor, and the finer points of society. She can identify families by their coat-of-arms or colors, she knows the best colors to wear for each season and for the type of occasion, what fork to use for which part of the meal, and so forth. Since hers was also a military family, she learned how to deal with the military, recognizing ranks, codes and hand signals, and being able to move through the bureaucracy inherent in such an organization. This naturally comes with the drawback that she is virtually ignorant of the lower classes, their way of life, and their slang.[/indent] [color=DodgerBlue]❖ A Rock in the Storm[/color] [indent]Marina is a trained soldier, fitting to the traditions of her family, and she has a particular knack for engaging the enemy from a defensive position. She lacks the subtle acrobatics of other fighters, and when she moves position, she will do so with her weapon's burst-mode recoil sending her sliding across the battlefield in a spectacularly loud and crude fashion. But when she plants herself into place, she becomes a rain of terror on her distant enemies, and up close her enormous blade serves as defense and offense simultaneously. She is also well-trained in the heavy armor she wears, able to reposition herself as needed to take the most advantage of it, and if there are any fortifications or choke points that she can use to her advantage, then she will hold the line for as long as it takes to get her friends to safety or to give them the time to regroup and attack from another angle. And despite her prejudices, she works well with her allies in combat, able to launch them around or cover them.[/indent][/indent][/indent] [color=DodgerBlue][sub][u] Ｓ Ｅ Ｍ Ｂ Ｌ Ａ Ｎ Ｃ Ｅ [/u][/sub][/color] [indent][indent][color=DodgerBlue]❖ Anchor[/color] [indent]When Marina activates her Semblance, her density increases a hundredfold along with her weight, making her an immovable object on the battlefield and giving her an extra coating of Aura armor. She will be practically impossible to be shoved around or knocked over, and she will be able to survive stronger attacks than ever while her Semblance is up. This allows her to become a rallying point for her comrades or a distraction to a stronger foe, and she can focus on shooting or slashing at the enemy instead of worrying about angling her armor to deflect attacks. Suddenly increasing your weight, however, has the downside that whatever surface you are standing on must be able to hold that weight. She will break through wooden docks and platforms, even stone floors in upper stories of buildings, if she is not careful of where she deploys her Anchor. This can be used deliberately to allow her to escape, as she won't get hurt from the fall, but it will take her out of a fight if she times its use incorrectly, and her enemies may find creative ways to take advantage of this. While Anchored, she also cannot use the recoil of her weapon's burst-mode to move from her position, so it limits her mobility even more sharply as a result. It has the odd side-effect of reducing her life support requirements as well, allowing her to go without breathing as long as she is able to maintain her Semblance. She is able to walk slowly while being Anchored, so she can theoretically walk back to land should she sink herself in a body of water.[/indent] [/indent][/indent] [/indent][/indent] [/color] [/hider]