[quote=@Buddha] Alright, first off, some of my comments are not meant to be 100% serious. :lol I don't really care about the callsign for instance, so that it's a mouthful doesn't really matter. [/quote] That was pretty clear tho? I wasn't really answering seriously, even felt tempted to insert a shush in the end. [quote=@Buddha] True, but there's a reason they're at war. I could've clarified it but opted to do it in the IC, because otherwise I'd have to give away the main antagonist already and I'd prefer not to do that. But in short; there's a war between Kirigakure and Konohagakure at the moment, however that only started some.. one year ago? So it's possible that he's from Kirigakure. However, them being allied after the first war seems unlikely to me. I'd also opt to change the villages (or just leave the alliance bit out? Whether you're allied or not, during peacetime you'd want to avoid killing shinobi of another village, especially in an exam). A single shinobi being the reason for a war seems a bit much, especially if he went rogue anyway. [/quote] Rather than the reason, I thought about having him as one of the triggers to the war. Like, there was already a reason but he acted to give a justification to the start of the war. Franz Ferdinand's Shinobi version. [quote=@Buddha] There are plenty of strong shinobi in Amegakure though, and for a village that is relatively small and has been the underdog for a long time (and thus at risk of invasion) I'd say that taking in a wanted criminal is more of a reason to get invaded than a reason to strengthen herself. I see where you are coming from but I don't think the con's would outweigh the pro's in this case. [/quote] Fair enough. I'll go ahead and change this specific part to make him more suitable for the role. [quote=@Buddha] Which is a bit too much. In practice, it's too much like body flicker. In fact, it's unknown currently how swift release is even different from body flicker; I'm not against him being really speedy, but there's something about instant movement that is cheesy in a fight. Also, having a jonin going around zooming between enemies finishing them all off seems like it'd force the students to just kinda.. sit back and watch. Cool in theory, but for an RP, it's not that good. [/quote] Well, i Don't see him as being that active to start with. Going around killing weaklings with cowardly attacks hardly suits a battle addict like him - there's nk thrill on it. Still, I can take out this technique and make him an user of se form of chakra strengthening or some variation of the eight gates of wonder.