[Center][h2][color=teal]Mora Kingsly[/color][/h2] [I]Interacting with[/i] [@Jinxer] ---[/center] Mora sighed deeply, enjoying the heat that slowly seeped into her flesh. Inside the cabin she had carelessly dumped her pack nearby a bunk and crawled half frozen into the bed. Wrapping the soft comforter around her frozen body the red beaded woman allowed herself to relax fully as she ignored the need a of water that begun to trickle down. As her limbs began to thaw she flexed her toes, cautiously checking that each of them worked. [Color=teal]"I am [i]not[/i] meant for the cold."[/color] she muttered to herself as the tinkling of laughter echoed from the outside. On one hand she was glad they were able to find some bliss within the frozen world outside those doors, on the other she had no desire to step foot back out there. At least not until she was warm through and through. Instead, Mora hunkered down, closing her eyes as she tried to match the voices to her fellow cadets. Was that Gabriel's voice shouting? Maybe, Olivia's laughter- it certainly wasn't Jade's. Mora could feel herself smirk as she played her game. Here's laughter was like a starburst of color, that is [I]when[/i] she laughed. A sudden chill snaked through the air as the cabin door swung open. Frowning she chose to huddle further down as she listened to footsteps pad through the cabin. [B]"You're missing a hell of a snowball fight outside, Ra."[/b] A familiar voice called out to her, bringing the reluctant Mora out from her cover fortress. She had opened her mouth to respond but hesitated as she got a closer look at the girl's face. Mora slowly brought herself to the edge of the bed, still wrapped tightly as she took a closer look at Lauren. Normally shed see the soft smile that graces her lips, the kindness that pooled in her gaze and the way she carried herself always put Mora at ease but instead the girl looked wary. Mora noticed the waver that flashed across her face. Her lips drawn and taunt as she seemed to struggle against something unknown. [B]"Ra, you awake still? I need to talk to you about something."[/b] [Color=teal][i]'Yeah, okay. Somethings wrong."[/i][/color] concern had filled her thoughts as she sat up a little straighter, [color=teal]"Yeah, I'm up." [/color] Mora replied as she watched Lauren move to her pack. Seconds dragged out between them as she pulled out her medical bag and brought it over to them. Now Mora was flush with fear and confusion. Quizzically, she watched Lauren as she pulled out a bottle and handed it too her. Blinking Mora took it in her own hands, the glass was chilled from its trek in the snow and bit at the warmth of her hands. With a burning curiosity she plucked the cork from it mouth and breathed in the pungent scent of alcohol. Mora's nose wrinkled at the scent, she had never been fond of the drink and for a moment wondered why her friend had given her a bottle. That was until she had started to roll the bottle in her hands, [color=teal]"Empty?"[/color] she inquired as she looked up but the sight of Lauren stung. [B]"I needed it to sleep. I have done ever since... that day. That was my last bottle."[/b] the words poured from her small frame, almost apologetic in nature. Mora's mouth had opened as she searched within herself for the words bit Lauren gave no pause as she stood up and began to hastily pace the floor between the two. [B]"I meant to tell you... been trying to tell you ever since - no, that's not right. What I wanted - um - no that's not - erm, just let me start again."[/b] She could hear the tightness in her voice. The madness that clawed at the end of each syllable as her body trembled from the sorrow that haunted her. She plugged the cork back onto the bottle, setting it in her lap as she watched Lauren begin to unravel. Mora wanted to say something, anything, that could sooth the manic muttering from her friend but her mind felt heavy and blank. As her heart squeezed in pain as she realized how much she hadn't been paying attention to Lauren. How much she missed over the time spent together and even now, she sat there dumbstruck as Lauren finally stopped to face her. [B]"Cain."[/b] It was as if someone had shattered the world around her at the sound of his name. Mora could feel the tears begin to sting but didn't dare to clear them away. She watched, breath shallow, for Lauren to continue. Seeing the grief mirrored on the girl's own delicate features.[b]. "I see him. Every night. I saw... then. Sometimes it was what happened, sometimes he... he wasn't Cain. He'd curse us, threaten us. Then..."[/b] Lauren spat out, the words coming fast and tumbling over one another. Tears had begun to spill down her face as she watched Lauren further crack. Tracking each tear that slipped down her cheek to further lush away the own burning her in chest. [B]"It was you. I couldn't cope with - that was it for me. I couldn't sleep anymore. If I could dream then I would see it and... I couldn't. I needed a way out and that," [/b] she pointed at the bottle in Mora's hand, [b]"that was the only thing that worked. But I ran out. I don't want to carry on like this, Ra!" [/b] She was pacing again, her arms active as she gestured or pressed against her head or crossed against her chest. [Color=teal]"Lauren..."[/color] Mora's words came our as a harsh whisper as Lauren continued, [b]"It's more though. I couldn't come to you or Jade, you were both suffering so much! Cain was your brother, how could I ask for help when it must have been worse for you than it ever was for me?"[/b] Inside Mora could feel pieces of her breaking. Each word had sent the knife twisting through gut a little further. How had she shut out Lauren for so long? Mora guessed she just assumed the girl had dealt with her grief and that because she still had her father that she didn't [i]need[/i] her in that way. [B]But... it was my fault! If I hadn't been there - if you hadn't been with me - you'd have both made it."[/b] Lauren continued to pour her soul out to her, all her fears and self loathing. Her blaming herself for her brothers death. Mora open and closed her mouth several times as Lauren pressed on, [b]"Because Pa - because you had to help me, Cain ran off. We would have been faster without Pa, made it to the boats before the Titans got there, Cain would've made it. I should've told you both to go but I didn't. So it's my fault." "But the worst bit... I wasn't fair to him. He died not knowing anything and maybe he did it... for me. You know? I sometimes think he did it to impress me. I know that's not true but I can't help it. And that... that's my fault too. I know he liked me and I never told him. I ran away and never said anything. So he died being lied to, because Pa was hurt, because you were both with me. Because of me."[/b] She has sunk to the floor; a trembling, quivering mess. [B]"I couldn't tell him because... because it was you, Ra. How could I? What would it do to you both, I couldn't do that. So I said nothing, I let him indulge and then he died because of it. Because I was a coward, because I ran away and didn't want to say the truth. Ever since... I just wanted to care for you. Look after you. Make it up to you both, make up for not saying anything. But... it hurts." [/b] She curled up on herself, kneeling in the floor and bent double as if savaged by stomach cramps, hugging herself tightly and sobbing. [B]"I'm sorry, Ra! I love you and it killed Cain! I killed your brother and I can't bring him back. I can't do this anymore, I can't cope. I don't have any right to ask you now, you couldn't ever love me, you'll probably always hate me, but,"[/b] she looked up from her position on the floor and with the weighted words of years of torment and pain managed to eek out,[b] "help me?"[/b] Mora's body moved as her mind sat addled with the weight of the information. She didn't know how she felt at the moment but knew one thing, never did she blame Lauren. Not once in the years that had passed. Not a day as they worked through training. Sure, there was jealousy that had stained her thoughts when it came to Lauren's father. Her being able to cling to something of the past where all Mora had was emptiness. Mora had blamed herself though. Every night and every morning. She had blamed herself for not being there for her family. For being weak. For not dying with them. She enclosed the trembling girl in her arms pulling her in close and hard. [Color=teal]"No."[/color] She managed to squeak out as she pressed her face into Lauren's hair. [Color=teal]"It was never [i]your[/i] fault, you hear me?![/color] Mora's voice shook and bled with emotions. [Color=teal]"I never blamed you. I will never hate you. Law,"[/color] She pulled back to cup the girls face in her hands, brushing away her tears, [color=teal]"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I wasn't there for you."[/color] Her eyes searched Lauren's, pleading and drowning in guilt, [color=teal]"I'm so sorry. I, I missed the signs. I didn't let you grieve with me. I-"[/color] Mora shook as she pulled Lauren back to her, [color=teal]"You are precious to me. Law and I am so sorry."[/color] The word sorry felt like such an inadequate word- how could she excuse herself from her neglect? How could she make up for years of letting Lauren drown in herself? [Color=teal]"I'm here."[/color] she breathed, trying to calm herself. [Color=teal]"I am here and I'm never letting you go."[/color] Mora's heart felt like the day she watched Cain die. Lauren's cries now echoes beside Cain's screams and inside she felt the old familiar sting of self hatred, but Lauren was [i]alive[/I]. She was flesh and blood beneath her touch and in her silence, Mora made a new promise to herself. She'd keep Lauren safe, keep her close and loved at all costs.