[quote=@Raineh Daze]
Your equipment list is formatted as if everyone is going to understand what you mean. "Enchanted"? In what way? Tyaethe's equipment is enchanted but the enchantments have no resemblance to Indrau's sword. What the hell is an "eastern longsword"? You're also presumably confusing daggers with something much shorter, because having a foot of sharp steel just hanging on your chest ten times over is probably a recipe for disaster. Why on Earth does he have a magical staff and what does that [i]do?[/i] None of this is [i]explained[/i], nor the vagueness of a "silver dagger". Is that significant? If it's normal silver, that's not very sharp. 

Then there's the fact it's still formatted like a character sheet for some tabletop. It's all just keywords and percentages, and that percentage stuff isn't going to be useful as nobody's making dice rolls here. Plus the equipment list numbering specific arrows and vague necessities doesn't gel with being part of a knightly order that, in general, is going to be fully and competently supplied.


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Added those answers.