[hider=Chad “The Ox” Jones][center][img]https://scontent-sjc2-1.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s640x640/sh0.08/e35/c181.0.718.718/19761704_112290016069345_8879380259212886016_n.jpg[/img]
[h1][b]Chad “The Ox” Jones[/b][/h1]

[h3]What's your name?[/h3]

[i]My dad says I don’t have to say shit to cops unless I have a lawyer.  You have to tell me if you’re a cop, right?  I think I saw that on tv once.  Because if this is about who gave Percy that atomic wedgie is wasn’t me, but it was hilarious and whoever did it is probably a genius and like… super strong.  Probably handsome too.  I don’t know, I’m not some nerd detective.  But, I guess you’re cool.  I’m Chad, but my boys call me “Ox”, because I’m built like an ox, and I’ll like run you over and shit.[/i]

[h3]How old are you?[/h3]

[i]Why, are you trying to make fun of me because I got held back a grade?  My mom says that school is for idiots anyways and it doesn’t mean shit in the real world.  I’m thirteen, but only for a couple more months.  I just have problems with like, reading and math and that crap.  The numbers and letters get all turned around in my head.  That junk is for dweebs anyways.  My dad doesn’t use any of that and he’s like the strongest guy I know.[/i]

[h3]What do you look like?[/h3]

[i]Uh, are you blind or something?  I’m right here.  Maybe you are a cop.  My old man says cops are all inbred so they ask stupid questions.  Fine, I guess I’m like tall or something.  I’m also super strong.  Make sure you write that down.  I can bench probably five hundred.  I’m also the tallest kid in class, though maybe that’s because I’m also the oldest.  Whatever.[/i]

[h3]Do you have any hobbies?[/h3]

[i]What do you mean ‘hobbies’?  Like nerd stuff?  God no.  Reading and all that crap is lame.  I’m only in the book club because it was either that or get suspended and there’s only stupid shit on tv during the day.  I guess if you just mean things I like, then it’s sports.  Mostly football, you know, man stuff like that.  I also have a bb gun that I use to shoot beer cans and glass bottles off the fence behind the dump.  What’s that?  Why do you have a picture of me?  Oh god, mom showed you this?  It doesn’t mean shit!  So I found this dog and it was sick and I helped it feel better.  Like whatever.  I only did it because I’m totally going to train it to be a badass guard dog and attack people.  Wait, are those more photos?  Dammit.  So I like animals.  That’s not gay or anything.[/i]

[h3]What are some things that you especially dislike?[/h3]

[i]Stupid questions like this.  For real, do they pay you to do this?  Super lame.  Though I guess it’s better than science class.  I guess I hate reading and math and all that stuff.  I also hate kids who think that just because they’re smart or that they have money that they’re better than me.  I bet they don’t even do weight training.[/i]

[h3]What are your goals for the future? Both immediate and long-term.[/h3]

[i]Right now I’m pretty focused on getting Brittney Holder to be my girlfriend.  She says it’s never going to happen but I think I’ve got a shot.  If that doesn’t work out then maybe her best friend Sarah.  Or Jessica.  Or Stacey.  Then someday… and I swear to god I’ll punch you in the dick if you tell anyone this, I’d like to be a vet.  Animals are cool as shit and I’ll roundhouse kick anyone who hurts them.  You hear me?[/i]

[h3]What's your home life like? Specifically, what is your relationship like with your parents?[/h3]

[i]What does that matter?  I’m never home anyways.  Me and my boys are always off doing cool shit.  I live in a crappy trailer park, my mom works at the diner and my dad is a drunk.  Normal stuff.  I like my mom but my dad is a piece of crap when he’s angry, and he’s always angry.  Though he did teach me how to fight.  Mom brings me home extra pie from work sometimes.  She says I’m her little treasure.   She’s sappy like that.  Also she’s really good at making tv dinners.  Most people don’t know you have to stir it part way through to make sure it heats up evenly, but she does.  She’s pretty smart.[/i]

[h3]What's your favorite animal, and why?[/h3]

[i]I like all animals, but wolves are the best.  They’re pack animals, like me and my boys, and they’ll fuck you up if they have to.  My mom says I can’t have a wolf so I take in stray dogs instead.  I build them their own dog houses in the backyard and work part time at the Piggly Wiggly to buy them dog food.  They’re loyal and would probably kill you if you tried to mess with me.  Well, maybe not actually but they would really think about it.  Not Lazer though, he’s missing a leg.  [/i]

[h3]How about your favorite color?[/h3]

[i]That’s gay.  Who has a favorite color?  Lame.  I don’t know.  Brown I guess?  Like a football or mud or something manly like that.  Or maybe blood red.  Yeah that’s cool. [/i]

[h3]What are your grades like?[/h3]

[i]I thought we already went over this at the parent teacher meeting.  Yeah, “F” doesn’t stand for “Fantastic”  I get it.  Stop riding my jock so hard.  You guys suck.  I’m just not good at school, okay?  If I can get my grades up a bit, I won’t have to get held back again.  That’s all I care about.[/i]

[h3]Do you believe in magic?[/h3]

[i]Are you serious?  You’re a total weirdo, aren’t you.  I bet you watch Star Trek. [/i][/center][/hider]