I'm adressing the comments individually because [s]I just woke up and would probably mess things up otherwise[/s] it looks better like this. [quote=@Lord Sawsaw2] Alright, suggestions and changes. My biggest overall change for the Illusion magic would be to make it incomplete somehow so that even those who have been affected by it still have some way of fighting back against it, rather than the fight just straight up being over once it affects them. And no, the option of fighting with your eyes shut at all times is not an acceptable drawback, that's arguably even more debilitating. My suggestion for a magic-wide drawback is that the illusions don't work in the very corner of people's visions (like the SEP field from Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy). Since most people won't know your magic is illusions, they won't know to look for it, but in a protracted fight it's possible for people to figure it out, particularly in your bigger and more grandiose illusions.[/quote] For an overall weakness, It's pretty hard to limit illusions like that since they have fairly different objectives and things like a general weakness hardly work. The closing eyes option was mentioned multiple times mostly because it is pretty much the simplest method, since all of his illusions are pretty much visual, but I can as well add the corner of eye weakness for the hiding aspect of wonderland and Chesire's Reality as a whole, since both specialize in making things unnoticeable, but for the ones based in projecting illusions I'd rather apply other weaknesses if necessary. [Quote=@Lord Sawsaw2] As for the individual skills, Jabberwocky is fine as long as you have to have physical contact to activate it on a person. Simply being able to point at someone and fully change their emotions to the point that they would cut down their allies is hella broken. In something that will be repeated later, I'd also suggest that if you lose line of sight to the individual in question, the effect ends, or if you move too far away from them it ends. 2 minutes is a hell of a long time with no counters, that's like a page and a half to two pages of text. Obviously I will be lenient with this when you're using it on NPCs. [/quote] I'm perfectly fine with having to use physicial contact to start it and have a distance restriction to maintain it active, just ain't sure about what would be the ideal range and would like to know your opinion about it. I can also reduce the duration of the technique if you feel it is necessary. [Quote=@Lord Sawsaw2] Wonderland is such a sweet idea, but at present it's also hilariously broken. As written, your wonderland could literally just put them in a .5m x .5m box so that they can't move, turn, or fight, and then you could just walk up to them and slit their throats. This needs to be changed to make it balanced either by making Seto and all his allies follow the rules of the Wonderland, making the wonderland only exist in a small diameter cone made up of Seto's field of vision (like 5m max), making illusory objects that are touched disappear (can still be played around by leaving objects in so that when they start walking through walls to make them disappear, they walk into actual walls/holes/trees/spikes because they don't believe they're real), or making it another targeted spell like Jabberwocky. I'm definitely open to more ideas from you about how to balance this, but be prepared for a reasonably strenuous vetting process for this to make sure it both works for you and is fair for everyone else.[/quote] I actually planned to make Wonderland's rules valid for everyone inside it's effective area, Seto included, from the very start. Would be awfully broken otherwise. Also, I'd like to mention that while the environment created is "solid" it also respects the affected person's mentality, making it so as long as they believe they can break something they'll be able to do so (e.g. as long as you can break a wall normally, you'll probably be able to break a tables in wonderland since you're certain that you're capable of breaking tables.). I originally planned to make it something fun to implement in conjunction to Seto's talking to make crazy scenes, like someone lifting a chair and he suddenly mentioning that its weight actually increases when out of the ground, making the person unconsciously believe that it is suddenly heavier, or watch some physically weak character trying to break a seemingly solid wall just to suddenly say it is made of jelly, instantly making them able to break through it. Kind of marvelously fits the character's theme and is undoubtedly pretty wonderland-ish, though it may be fairly troublesome to implement on pvp. Is that fine for you or you'd preffer if I made it simpler to avoid confusion? [Quote=@Lord Sawsaw2] Moving on to the darkness magic. As canon magic, these are all approved of course, with the following stipulations. - Dark Deflect can only affect pure magic spells, not things with physical components - Dark Enveloping Claw can either be cast as a Trap (as I'll explain later to everyone) or as a two-post spell, giving the receiving party time to react to it being cast - Dark Grab has the same secondary requirement, in that it allows the target to react to being attacked and potentially dodge or whatever - Same with Darkness Breath I say these only because the pages you referenced have them landing immediately as auto-immobilize attacks, which are inappropriate for a combat RP with potential inter-player combat.[/quote] I'm fine with all of this. No secondary comments here. [Quote=@Lord Sawsaw2] I hope I haven't been too harsh! Please let me know what you think of the changes and we can work on getting it all approved. Outside of the spell, your CS looks fantastic, so once the spells are done you'll be approved. [/quote] Not harsh at all. All of your worries were fairly justified and important for balancing after all, couldn't possibly be annoyed by that. P.s. thank for the compliment~ I was actually fairly worried about quality since it is pretty much an adaptation of an old character and I kind of had some difficulty in rewriting stuff.